How nice to eat? Etiquette: rules of conduct at the table. How to use cutlery

Each of us would do well to brush up on the rules of etiquette at the table, and perhaps even learn something new about how to behave while eating. Most important rules etiquette that absolutely everyone should use.

Each of us notices when someone in a cafe at a nearby table eats carelessly or stealthily wipes his hands on his knees. In the same way, other people notice our mistakes, any behavior is conspicuous and can cause embarrassment. Therefore, it is better to check yourself and correct your own behavior if necessary.

How to behave at the table

General rules apply to any situation, they will never be superfluous. The first thing we pay attention to when we see a person is his posture. Posture characterizes not only the behavior or condition of a person, but also reveals the secrets of his character.

An insecure person will fidget nervously on the edge of a chair, a notorious person will try to slouch in order to become less noticeable. Sit up straight, but in a way that is comfortable for you. Hands can be placed on the edge of the table or on your knees, and it is better to press your elbows to your sides.

By the way, in order to learn to hold the elbows near the body in Soviet time I was advised to periodically train - to have lunch, holding a couple of weighty books to my elbows. This is necessary so that the correct bodily pattern is formed, and you keep your elbows flawlessly even when you don’t think about it at all.

Rules table etiquette imply almost all situations that can happen to a person and give a clear recommendation on how to act in a given situation.

Naturally, table etiquette at home and restaurant etiquette are somewhat different. However, there are rules that are appropriate in any situation:

do not speak too loudly;
do not take a fork or spoon with food too far from the mouth;
you can not make sounds while eating;
eat calmly, without undue haste.

Restaurant

The rules of conduct in a restaurant imply some composure - you need to behave correctly and with dignity in order to make a good impression on others.

A man must let the lady go first, but if a company of men or women goes to the restaurant, then everyone is on an equal footing or rely on the initiator of the dinner.
If several people are to meet at dinner, and someone is late, then by mutual agreement with the rest of the guests, you can wait for those who are late for about a quarter of an hour. A longer wait is a sign of disrespect for guests who arrived on time.
If you happened to be late, then you should apologize, and then just join the others. You should not draw special attention to the fact of being late and explain the reason, just join in the table conversation.
During a meeting of a man and a woman in a restaurant, a man should read the menu and offer his companion any dishes. For a girl in this case, expressing her indifference is a sign of bad manners. Etiquette in a restaurant implies the participation of a lady in the choice of dishes.
In a restaurant, you should not conduct a conversation in raised tones and laugh out loud. If this happened by accident, it makes sense to apologize to other visitors and be quieter. Observe table etiquette, and if someone behaves inappropriately at the next table, then this should be reported to the waiter.
You need to start eating when the waiter brought out the ordered dishes to all those present. If a person who is waiting for his dish to be prepared does not mind, he can make an offer to others to start eating.
It is strictly forbidden to work at the table hygiene procedures- wipe your face, neck and hands with napkins, comb your hair or tint your lips. If you need to pay attention to your appearance, it is better to do it in a special room. Dining etiquette also does not welcome traces of lipstick on dishes. Before you start eating, the girl should carefully remove the lipstick with a napkin.
Any interaction with food also looks uncivilized - food is on the table in order to eat it. Taking photos for Instagram, blowing on the soup, meticulously poking around in the salad, commenting on the ingredients - is indecent.
If in some dish you come across cartilage or bone, you need to carefully return inedible element back into the spoon and transfer to a plate (or napkin).

How to handle appliances

In no case should you check the cleanliness of the appliances, and if you still notice a cloudy spot on the fork or spoon, you need to quietly draw the attention of the waiter to this oversight and politely ask for a replacement.
In most restaurants, the table is set in advance, and cutlery is laid out on both sides of the serving plate.
Do not get lost if there are more dishes on the table than you expected to see - everything has its own purpose, and if you are in doubt about which fork or spoon you should take, you can always see how other guests solve this problem.
Those devices that lie on the left of the plate are used with the left hand, and those that are laid out on the right must be held in the right hand.
With complex serving, each dish relies on its own devices, so if you are in doubt which fork should be taken, take the far one - the one that is furthest from the edge of the plate. As you change dishes, you will gradually approach the nearest appliances.
The knife is used either for cutting food, or for spreading pates and butter (for example, during breakfasts). You should not try pieces from a knife.
Cut meat or fish should be sequentially, as it is eaten. Cutting the whole portion at once is a bad form. It is generally accepted that this way the dish cools down faster and loses its main flavors.

Learn in advance a few differences between different cutlery, so as not to get into a mess.

Forks

second hot dishes are eaten with a table fork, it has four cloves, and in length it is slightly inferior to the diameter of the plate and is placed on the left;
a fish fork is used for hot fish dishes, it looks smaller than a diner and has four short cloves, a fish fork is easy to recognize by its recesses - they are needed to separate the bones;
snack fork - a reduced duplicate of a table fork, they eat cold snacks with it;
dessert fork - for pies, small, corresponds to the size of a dessert plate and looks atypical;
a fruit fork equipped with two prongs, usually served with a fruit knife;
the remaining forks are considered auxiliary, they are placed next to the dish that they need to eat.

Knives

any second hot dishes are eaten with a table knife, it is placed to the right of the plate, the blade is turned to the plate;
a fish knife is blunt and resembles a spatula, used to separate the flesh of the fish from the bones;
the snack knife is small and has teeth;
dessert and fruit knife look similar - they are the smallest.

spoons

a tablespoon - the largest, lies to the right of the plate;
a dessert spoon is served with a dessert that does not require cutting - soft puddings, jellies and whipped cream;
an ice cream spoon is served with a bowl;
the cocktail spoon has a very narrow and long handle;
a teaspoon can be served with any hot drink;
coffee spoon - the smallest, served only with black coffee.

Dialogue and table manners

Table etiquette includes not only the use of utensils, proper positioning and good posture, but also the manner in which dialogues and conversations are conducted.

It is worth noting that table etiquette categorically prohibits discussing provocative issues that can lead to a serious conflict - therefore, one should refrain from commenting on money, politics and religion.

How to behave at the table and what to say? Be sure to look at the person who is addressing you, listen without interrupting, and only then answer. If you think some questions of the interlocutor are inappropriate for a meal, delicately offer to discuss this a little later. In all other cases, the answer should be easy and unconstrained.

The rules of etiquette in a restaurant do not imply violent disputes either - refrain from inappropriate comments and lighten the mood with a cute joke if someone else raises their voice.

You should not talk only together, involve the rest of the participants in the meal. For example, if the conversation turned to a recent vacation, you can ask one of the interlocutors if he is going to go on vacation in the near future or what places he prefers to relax.

It is also good form in any table conversation to praise the host, chef or initiator of the meeting - find a few kind words to note the general atmosphere of the evening.

A short course in etiquette

Do what the majority does.
Don't point out to others their mistakes, in the most extreme case, this can be said quietly in an undertone and only to your neighbor on the table.
Don't miss your meal for too long.
Leaving the table - apologize.
Try everything and eat what you like.
Behind common table do not discuss diet, eating disorders, food restrictions alcoholic beverages and diet.

Some rules of conduct at the table are best studied by looking at the pictures - look at the basic table setting patterns, you can also watch the video on how to properly hold this or that device.

Table etiquette is not that difficult if you give it a little time, and following all the rules will help you present your best side.

Young parents are not always serious about the advice of their elders in raising children, and teaching their baby the rules of behavior at the table is considered the tenth thing. So it comes down in some families to completely non-pedagogical shouts: “don’t champ, close your mouth and chew, sit up straight, don’t rock in your chair, don’t grab from the table before dinner…”. On this they consider their mission completed. And the grandmother knows for sure that in a few years parents will have to blush for such an undergrowth. Or another situation, the kid has been poking around in the soup for half an hour, choosing from there what he likes best, as a result pushing the plate away, spilling the contents on the floor, on the table and on himself ... A familiar situation? Forgivable if the child is only a year old. What if it's four or five? Where is the line between childish awkwardness and lack of good manners? And when should you start introducing your child to the basics of etiquette? Let's see what the rules of behavior for children at the table should be.

Everyone has a few unpleasant moments in their memory when a neighbor's teenager or an invitee to children's holiday the kid simply disrupted lunch with his behavior. They were talking loudly, reaching across the table for best piece cake, champed, and even choked, not chewing food. The list of unacceptable acts is endless.

Let's protect ourselves from such behavior of a son or daughter in the future. Let's try to systematize the training of our crumbs in good manners, so that it is not burdensome either for them or for us. best age to start training - 1.5 - 2 years. Naturally, at this age, the child will not be able to understand all the rules of adult etiquette. Yes, this is not necessary.

When to teach? Everything has its time

Table manners for kids are slightly different from adult etiquette, because many hyperactive children become little pranksters during meals. Most children learn good manners before the age of 5. But you need to start teaching a child as early as 1.5 - 2 years. Of course, there may be exceptions to the rules, but be aware that the later you start learning, the more difficult your lessons will be for your child.

We read an article on how to teach a child to eat independently and carefully -

from 1.5 to 5

At this age, the child is actively mastering the skills of the world around him. He absorbs everything he sees, tries to imitate adults. It's time to learn the basics of etiquette in a playful way;
It is mandatory to wash your hands before eating. Mom herself should not forget to wash her hands before feeding the baby. Before each meal, she should go to the bathroom with the baby and wash her hands and herself and him. Over time, it will do this automatically;
Feeding the baby must be done dining table and not in the nursery and not in front of the TV. This will help your child to take food seriously in the future, to respect the work of those who prepare food. Put the baby on a high chair so that he does not look out from under the table, but feels like an equal member of the family;
Lay a linen napkin on your baby's lap. Clothes will stay clean even if the child spills soup or tea. As an adult, having a napkin in a restaurant will not put your child into a stupor;
Do not let the child play with food, crumble bread, spread porridge on the table. Such behavior is not permissible even at 2 years old. Try to patiently explain to the baby that it’s ugly to behave like that, that mom is ashamed of him. Mom and dad never act like that. Of course, the baby will not listen to you the first time;
Only one rule: never yell at him. Be patient and consistent in your demands. It is impossible today to forbid something, and tomorrow not to notice what was created by the child;
By the age of five, children should already be able to handle a fork and knife, while children's. They should not be confused that the knife should be held in the right hand and the fork in the left hand. By this age, you need to teach the child which foods are eaten with the help of appliances, and which ones are taken by hand.

5 to 10

The most fruitful age for education, but also the most difficult. During this period, the child does not so unconditionally trust the words of the parents. He already independently tries to understand the life and actions of the people around him.

Mom and dad should not allow any indulgence for themselves in the ritual of eating. If you teach a child not to drink juices from a package, but to pour them into a glass, it would be unacceptable to violate this rule yourself. Or just one day forget to wash your hands before dinner. Or not to thank the hostess for dinner. The child will notice this, and your words will no longer be true for him.

(The picture is clickable, you can copy and print)

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At 5 - 6 years old, the baby must learn how to behave at the table and no longer violate accepted norms. Each violation must be discussed with the child on family council. This will help him understand the seriousness of the demands of adults. But in no case should a “debriefing” be carried out in the presence of strangers, in a derogatory manner or with the help of shouting and swearing.

The kid already knows that you need to sit at the dining table straight, not swaying in a chair. It is unacceptable to spread your elbows and push your neighbors on the table with them. If it is difficult to enforce this rule with words, the reception with books helps a lot. During lunch, slip your child's armpit on a book and ask them to hold them until the end of the meal. A few of these exercises, and there will be no problems with the elbows;
The child does not allow himself to champ loudly, speak with a full mouth. It was instilled in him constantly. He also knows what to put in his mouth small pieces food and chew them thoroughly;
The kid is holding back belching and coughing. If this is not possible, he must turn away from the table and cover his mouth with a paper napkin;
It will be quite natural for a child under 10 years old to know that one cannot consider himself the center of society and attract everyone's attention to his person with various loud demands. If the baby needs to move away from the table, he should ask permission from one of the parents in a quiet voice, calmly. It is not necessary for everyone to know what he wants to go to the toilet;
You can not reach for a plate at the other end of the table through all the dishes. The child knows that he needs to ask to put the desired piece on his plate. You can’t rummage through a common dish in search of the best piece;
You can sit down at the table only after adults, and get up after everyone has eaten. If you do not want to sit and listen to the conversations of adults, the child simply asks permission to leave;
Gratitude for lunch should definitely manifest itself in the form of a magic word “thank you”.

10 and older

You did a good job teaching your offspring excellent manners and etiquette. However, it is too early to relax. He knows what every intelligent person should know and observe. But the rules good manners and behavior at the table is not limited to this. Ahead is the study of special cutlery that is not used daily. It would be nice to introduce your child to how to eat various exotic dishes. General knowledge about food traditions peoples of the world.

(The picture is clickable, you can copy and print)

Don't talk to your child in a didactic tone. For better assimilation rules of etiquette, a game form of training is suitable. You can come up with a dinner party for dolls and bears, setting the table with toy dishes according to all adult standards. Responsible for this dinner, of course, will be your child. And you just prompt and advise in time.
Be consistent and patient in your learning. Do not allow yourself to take it out on the child, even if he has done something unacceptable. Do not forget to praise and support the child for success.
Involve your child in preparing dinner. Entrust him to arrange the plates, bring the bread to the table. Working together will bring together and make the baby more respectful of food and the one who cooks dinner.
Call on cartoons and fairy tales that talk about the rules of etiquette to help you. Discuss with your child the scene you just saw from the movie on the topic. Don't skip real life examples. The rules of behavior at the table should be vividly woven into reality, this is not a frozen dogma.
Own example - best lesson. Children always imitate adults. Let's use this for learning. Of course, it is not easy to always control yourself and not let you grab a piece of delicious food on the fly, but remember about the child.

Why should a child be taught etiquette?

Your efforts will not be in vain. Adult life will very soon become your baby's life. A joint lunch with a potential employer, a visit to a restaurant with a girl you like, a business dinner with partners, corporate party… Often the most serious conversations are conducted at the dinner table. We read an article with comments and experiments

Video minute: table etiquette

Psychologists say that it is necessary to teach a child the rules of etiquette at the table from early childhood: from a year to two:

How to sit at the table

Lessons in good manners. How to behave at the table? How to sit, what can and should not be done at the table? You will learn in the lessons of good manners:

How Koksik and Shunya learned the rules of table manners

Moms take note!

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This question people ask in different ages. By the behavior and ability to use devices, one can judge the culture and upbringing of a person. At all times, table etiquette paid Special attention. Its rules were not invented in one day, they were formed and changed over the centuries.

All the rules for the use of plates and the position on the table of appliances - forks, spoons, knives, were carefully thought out, based on the convenience and freedom of movement of a person at the table. Knowledge of the laws of etiquette makes it possible to feel confident not only among friends, but also at a social event. All the subtleties restaurant etiquette at the table can be easily comprehended in courses on food culture and etiquette. There are also differences in the rules for eating, primarily based on folk traditions customs, tastes and peculiarities of national cuisine.

Family Etiquette

Even in the circle of the closest relatives, it is necessary to follow the rules of the culture of eating. The elders should sit at the table first, and only then the younger members of the family. Men, in turn, sit down at the table after all the ladies have sat down. You can’t start a meal until the head of the family has started it.

Eating does not accept the speedy eating of all the food on the plate. Talking with a full mouth, waving arms and cutlery, reading a book while eating, reaching across the table for a piece of cheese is considered a complete lack of manners. You can’t get up from the table earlier if the rest of the participants in the feast have not finished the meal.

It is very important in the process of eating to keep your back straight, you need to sit straight, your elbows should not be on the table. Remember that when communicating during a feast, in no case should you turn away from the interlocutors sitting on both sides. It is also not recommended to communicate with anyone through a neighbor.

Paper complications

The napkin, usually nicely folded, shouldn't scare you. Before eating, unfold it and place it on your knees. Only lips and fingers can be wiped with a napkin. Do not wipe your face with it or put it in your pocket at the end of the meal. Roll it up and place it on the side of your plate. If the napkin is on the floor, you do not need to pick it up.

How to use cutlery

Each cutlery has its own function. The spoon should be between the thumb and forefinger. It is not recommended to eat with a spoon those dishes that can be eaten with a fork, for example, side dishes, desserts,
casseroles, etc. A fork should take food from a plate, a knife can touch up food on a plate, you can not cut the dish into small pieces to facilitate eating, using only a fork. When chewing food, do not wave and gesticulate with a knife and fork, their ends should be directed downward, perpendicular or at an acute angle to the plate.

Cross your fork and knife on your plate if you want to take a slice of bread or change cutlery. When you have finished eating, the plate does not need to be moved or removed. Fold the cutlery diagonally on the plate - this will symbolize the end of the meal.

First course

There are many nuances associated with eating soup. Don't pour full plate soup, eating it in this case is very inconvenient. You can’t blow on the soup, etiquette allows you to only stir it slightly in a bowl for a very short time.

You need to eat soup from the tip of a spoon, which should be brought parallel to your mouth. Keep your thumb on the handle of the spoon. Eat soup before last drop considered extremely indecent, leave some liquid at the bottom of the plate and tilt it away from you, filling the spoon with soup. At the end of the first course, the spoon should remain on the plate. Do not lick and wipe the spoon with a napkin.

It is also impossible to keep a piece of bread constantly in your hand, according to the rules of etiquette, it is necessary to break off pieces not big size. It is not necessary to spread butter on bread by weight, it is customary to put it on a plate, holding it with your left hand, and spread butter with a knife.

Second course

It is also necessary to be able to eat second or hot dishes correctly. You can not hold the handles of a knife or fork in your fingers, hold them exclusively in your palms. Place your index finger on the base of the knife, in front of the blade. When you are about to cut food, hold your fork and knife at an acute angle, not perpendicular to the table.

Fish and seafood

Cutlery for fish and seafood is smaller than cutlery. Fish follows
cut with a knife and fork, slowly separating small bones to the edge of the plate. It is unacceptable to cut the fish with a knife or try to break it with a fork. Sometimes the bone is on the tongue, in this case, do not spit it into a plate, slowly remove it from your mouth onto a fork and put it on a plate. Seafood is usually eaten with a special fork with two cloves and sharp knife with a small hole in the blade. Etiquette allows you to eat small crustaceans and shrimp with your hands, but snail meat can only be removed with special tongs, carefully holding the shell with a knife.

Poultry should not be eaten by hand or with a fork. A piece should be held with a fork, cutting small slices with a knife from the bone.

Dessert

Cutlery for a variety of desserts is considered especially tricky. Their handles are directed to the right or left, and they are taken according to the direction of the handle, in the right or left hand.

If there is no need to cut a dish, then use only a fork, holding it in your right hand. Help yourself hold dessert with a slice of bread. A special fork is also used to eat asparagus, although some "experts" claim that it can be eaten with your hands. This is an outdated opinion, since since the beginning of the 20th century, asparagus has not been taken off the plate. For tea and coffee use special mugs, do not pour hot drink to the brim, you risk getting burned.

Knowledge of etiquette is not only a mandatory skill, but also an opportunity to produce indelible impression on others with noble manners and pleasant appearance.

Nuances

Today we will talk about the rules of table setting, existing norms behavior during meals and features of the use of various serving items. After all, you must admit that when you master this science, you feel much more confident in any company, on any journey, in any restaurant. I want to clarify that there are many styles, schools and rules, some even contradict each other. Here the factor of the country, institutions and traditions takes place. So I took one of the styles. So let's get started.

Start of lunch.

If you are a guest and there are no name cards on the table, remain standing until the host of the dinner indicates your place at the table.

Napkins.

As soon as you sit down at the table, put a napkin on your knees. It is customary to unfold the napkin in one smooth movement, shaking it in order to straighten it. How to put the napkin on your lap depends on the size of the napkin. There are two options: 1. Large napkins are usually served at more formal occasions, and in such cases it is customary to unfold the napkin halfway. 2. Smaller napkins are fully unfolded and completely cover the knees. Do not tuck the tissue in the collar, between shirt buttons, or in the waistband. If a dish is served that is customary to eat with your hands, look at the host of the dinner - and do the same as he (perhaps he will tuck a napkin under his chin, or tie it around his neck). Using a napkin. During lunch, use a tissue more often to blot your lips, but don't dry them. If there are also paper napkins on the table, it is permissible to wipe your lips with them. Be sure to blot your lips before drinking, this is especially true for women who use lipstick. Napkin rings. If the table is set with napkins in rings, after you have removed the napkin from the ring, put it in the upper left corner from the cutlery. After dinner, take the napkin by the center, thread it through the ring and place it on the table so that the center of the napkin looks at the center of the table. If you need to leave the table for a short time, put the napkin to the left of the plate. At the same time, try to fold the napkin so that the side you used is inside. What to do with a napkin after a meal? When the meal is over:

Fold the napkin in any convenient way.
If there is still a plate in front of you on the table, when leaving the table, put the napkin to the left of the plate.
If the table in front of you is empty, put the napkin in the center of the table, where your plate was.
Lay the napkin folded so that the soiled parts are not visible.
If afternoon coffee is served at the dinner table, leave the napkin on your lap.

General rules

You need to sit at the table straight, at a comfortable distance from the table, so that your arms bent at the elbows are at the same level with knives and forks. Never put your elbows on the table! If you don’t know where to put your hands, just fold them on your knees. If you have already been served a dish, wait until all the guests at the table are served, and only after that pick up the utensils and start eating. An exception is if the host of the feast invited you to start the meal. Then you can start eating without waiting for the rest of the guests. How close should dishes be to you so that you can reach them yourself? Everything is simple here: it is permissible to reach only those objects that are in close proximity to you, so that you can reach them with your outstretched hand, slightly deviating to the side. Do not bend over your neighbor to get a dish. To get something that is out of your reach, just ask "Pass, please ...", and also do not forget to thank anyone who will give you the necessary item. According to the rules of etiquette, before the start of the meal, each of those present must make sure that the other guests have been offered everything they might need - oil, water, salt and pepper, etc. Let's focus on how properly pass food at the table.

According to the rules, food is passed from left to right, while the dish should move in only one direction.
Two options are possible: either one of the diners holds the dish while his neighbor fills his plate from it, or the diner passes the dish to the neighbor and he himself holds the dish and fills his plate.
It is customary to put dishes that are heavy or inconvenient to hold on weight on the table with each transfer to a neighbor.
It is customary to pass tureens and other utensils with handles in such a way that the handle looks towards the guest receiving the dish.

If the food is served on a platter and needs to be butchered, the following rule applies when passing such a platter around the table: each of the diners holds the platter while his neighbor on the right serves food from it using common utensils attached to the platter. A little explanation is needed here. All cutlery is divided into individual (basic) and general (auxiliary). Individual appliances are designed to receive dishes, and common ones are for laying them out. Use of common appliances:

Common appliances are located to the right of the dish for which they are intended.
If both a fork and a spoon are served with the dish, there is a rule: the spoon is placed to the right of the dish, so that it is convenient to scoop up and lift food, and the fork is placed to the left to support the food with it.
Shared cutlery must be returned to the shared dish in the same way as they were served.
If the serving spoon was served on a separate plate-stand, after use it must be placed in a common dish (thus preparing for use by the next guest).
It is customary to point the blade of a carving knife into the dish to avoid cuts.

Eat at a calm pace, firstly, it contributes to better digestion, and secondly, this will show the owner of the feast that you want to enjoy both food and company. The quick absorption of food is a sign of disrespect for the owners, saying that you have come only to eat, and you are not interested in the company of those who have gathered. When eating, keep your mouth closed and try not to make any sounds, whether it be the clattering of cutlery against a plate or teeth, champing, or sipping soup. If the soup is too hot, don't blow on it - just wait until it cools down a bit. If you have food in your mouth - you should try to avoid talking at all costs, even if you have a suitable remark ready! First, chew, swallow food, and only then enter into a dialogue. If you need to go to the restroom, just say "Excuse me, I'll be away for a minute." If you need to leave the table due to an urgent matter (call, message, etc.), be sure to apologize to those present, show them that you would be more than happy to stay in their company, but business is urgent and you are forced to leave from the table. After all, you do not want your guests to get the impression that you are tired of their company!

Devices

How is it customary to put cutlery if you are still eating? Cross your knife and fork on your plate. If the size of the plate allows, it is better to fold the cutlery so that the tines of the fork rest on the blade of the knife. In this case, the knife handle should look to the right, and the fork handle to the left. This is a sign that you have not finished your dish yet, so your plate will not be changed. Please note that it is not customary to place cutlery in such a way that half is on the plate and half is on the table. However, this rule does not apply to chopsticks.

Exists two established how to use appliances- classic European(continental) and American. The first implies that the knife and fork are held in hands throughout the meal. It is not customary to put a knife on a plate, even if it is temporarily not needed. The American way of using cutlery allows for the possibility of putting the knife on the edge of the plate, if it is temporarily not needed, then the fork can be taken in the right hand and eat only with it. In this case, the knife must be placed with the blade inside the plate, with the handle on its edge. Dishes that do not need to be cut - scrambled eggs, scrambled eggs, pasta, vegetables, mashed potatoes, and so on - it is permissible to eat with a fork taken in the right hand. In this case, the fork can even be turned with the prongs up and the convex part down, like a spoon, to make it easier to pick up food. In this case, you can help yourself with a piece of bread, which is held in the other hand. Food is always cut towards itself and so that there are not too many pieces, and each of them can be easily put into the mouth. It is not customary to cut all the food into small pieces at once - do it gradually as needed. How to complete a meal. Each time you change dishes, when you have finished eating, the knife and fork (bulge down) are placed on the plate parallel to each other, the knife blade is facing inward. Instrument knobs are directed to the lower right corner. This is a signal to the waiter that you have finished eating.

A few words about how to complete the reception liquid food eaten with a spoon. There are two options here - soup bowls and soup plates. If soup or dessert is served in a deep bowl or cup, which stand on a special plate-stand, the device / devices after eating should be placed on this stand. If it's too small to hold the utensils, leave them in the bowl. If the soup is served in a soup bowl (a fairly wide and relatively deep bowl), leave the spoon in the bowl after eating.

Always praise the chef!

Even if the food was terrible, find and say something positive. No need to lie, for example, if the meat is burnt, you can say: "Well, the sauce was really excellent." It's nice when lunch ends on a positive note.

table setting

Now let's take a closer look at the rules for using individual cutlery. What forks, knives and spoons to use at dinner? The number of cutlery at the table depends on the number of courses to be served. There is a simple rule - at each change of dishes, the devices are sequentially used, starting with the ones closest to the plate.

You will also need to remember that all devices that are located on the left (and these are always forks) should be held in your left hand. On the right are spoons and knives, which are held in the right hand. If you see that there are also appliances on the table for common meals located with the handle to the left, then they should be taken with the left hand. A similar rule is used for devices located with the handle to the right. Now we will describe in more detail how to use these or other devices. As we mentioned above, the accepted norms of behavior at the table differ in different sides Atlantic. So: Europe against America. continental style Assumes that the fork should be held in the left hand, tines down. The knife is held in the right hand, at a level of 3-5 cm above the plate, while holding the blunt edge of the blade with the index finger. American style The fork is held in the same way as a pencil, its handle is between the thumb, index and middle fingers, and the remaining fingers are pressed to the palm. For the convenience of piercing food, the index finger is pulled out and pressed along the back surface of the fork handle as far as possible from the teeth. A knife is used if necessary. Hold the knife in your left hand on the folded middle, ring and little fingers, the index finger on the blunt edge of the blade, and the thumb on the opposite side of the handle. Using both a knife and fork is preferable, as it makes it easier to handle food. At formal dinners, two appliances are used for appetizers, salads, main courses, desserts and fruits. A knife should never be held like a pencil. When used in conjunction with a knife or spoon, the fork is held in the left hand in much the same way as a knife, with the tines pointing down. The spoon is held in the right hand, in the same way as the fork. Food should be eaten from the side of the spoon, it is never brought to the mouth at a right angle! Important! A spoon or fork should be lifted up and brought to your mouth, and not tilt your head to eat on them. Do not gesture with instruments.

Spices and bread

Let us dwell separately on the features of the use of spices and bread, as the most common and commonly used components of any feast. Rules for the use of salt and pepper Try! Before salting or peppering a dish, be sure to taste it. Pass salt and pepper together. Always pass both salt and pepper together, even if you are asked for the same thing. Open salt shakers. Some hosts prefer open salt shakers, and they are finding increasing use in table setting, often replacing the usual perforated salt shakers.

If there is no spoon in the open salt shaker, use the tip of a clean knife to scoop out the salt.
If an open salt shaker is only for you, you can take salt both on the tip of a knife, and just with a pinch - with your fingers.
If an open salt shaker is shared by all guests, never take salt from it with your hands or with a dirty knife.
It is customary to put salt taken from the salt shaker on a bread plate, or on the edge of any other plate in front of you.

How to properly handle bread and butter Usually bread on the table is served in a basket common to all guests at the table.

If the bread basket is on the table in front of you, feel free to grab it and offer the bread to the neighbor on the right.
If the loaf of bread is not sliced, cut off a few pieces, offer them to the neighbor on the left, and pass the rest of the bread, along with the basket, to the neighbor on the right.
Don't touch the bread with bare hands. Use the napkin that is placed under the loaf of bread in the basket to hold the loaf while you cut the bread.
Bread and butter are traditionally placed on the butter plate, which is to your left. The correct way to do this is to cut or break off a piece of bread large enough so that you can eat it in one bite, spread some butter on it and eat.
It is not customary to spread oil on big piece bread, and then bite off it.
It is not customary to hold a piece of bread in one hand and a drink in the other.
Never take the last piece of bread without first offering it to other diners.
Some restaurants serve bread with olive oil. In this case, you need to dip small (one bite) pieces of bread into the oil, and then eat them.
Oil is usually produced rectangular shape, so the butter knife has a rounded blade to make it easy to smear butter, and teeth on the edge of the blade to prick butter on them to transfer it to a plate.

Table setting rules Whether you are organizing a formal dinner or a friendly meeting, the basic rules of table setting remain the same. Try to give each guest as much space as possible that the size of the table will allow. Leave small gaps between seats. As we already wrote, knives and spoons are always located on the right, forks - on the left. Formally, each seat you need to put dessert plates - even if they are not supposed to be used - you can just put folded napkins on them. The number of cutlery will depend on the planned menu, but the arrangement will remain the same - forks on the left, knives and spoons on the right. It is necessary to lay out the cutlery in the order of serving the dishes - the closest to the plate are the cutlery for the first courses, and so on - the cutlery for each next dish farther from the plate (sometimes the reverse order occurs). dessert spoons and forks at informal dinners can be placed on top of the plate, or served after the main course has been removed. Always serve desserts with both a spoon and a fork. For ice cream, serve with a standard teaspoon or a long-handled teaspoon. Sorbet, which can be served between meals, is usually eaten with a teaspoon. Up to four glasses are allowed on the table at the same time: for red (large) and white (smaller) wine, for sparkling wines(elongated narrow) and for water (low wide glass).

The rules for serving meals at dinner differ depending on the degree of formality of the event. For formal dinners, the following norms apply: food is brought separately to each person present at the table, while the waiter approaches the diner on the left with dishes or drinks. It is acceptable for plates to be filled with food in the kitchen and then taken out and placed in front of each of the guests at the table. At less formal meetings, the host arranges the dish on the plates of the guests, and then they are passed to all those present, or the guests themselves put food on their own plates and pass it to their neighbors if necessary. How to use chopsticks. If you're unsure of your chopstick skills, it's best to practice using them at home beforehand. You need to hold the sticks parallel to each other, in your right hand. The thumb and forefinger hold and control the top stick. The middle finger lies quietly between the sticks, and serves as a support for the lower stick, which remains motionless. The top stick is moved by the thumb and forefinger, and is used to grab food and bring it to the mouth. When you are not using chopsticks, place them to the right of the plate, often a special stand is provided for chopsticks. Never use chopsticks to pass food to anyone, and never use chopsticks to point at other people. And in conclusion, we recall that as the owner of the feast, it is not customary to start clearing the table until the guests have left.

Additional rules and subtleties of table etiquette

It is possible to refuse a certain dish in case of an allergy to its constituent products, or due to dietary restrictions, and it is necessary to explain to the host of the feast (but not to all guests present) the reason for refusing the dish.
If you have food stuck between your teeth, you should not attempt to get it at the table, even if you have toothpicks. In case you absolutely cannot tolerate this inconvenience, you must apologize, leave the table, and remove the stuck food from your teeth in the toilet room.
Lipstick. Leaving traces of lipstick on cutlery and glasses is a bad form, it is especially undesirable on business lunches. If you have lipstick on your lips and don't have a tissue with you to remove it from your face, walk to the restroom, or grab a tissue from the bar when you approach the dining table.
Smoking. Despite the fact that in our country smoking is prohibited in restaurants, you may find yourself in restaurants with smoking areas in other countries, so let's consider the table manners in this situation. So, even if your table is located in the smoking area, never smoke between meals. The smell of cigarettes has a significant effect on taste sensations, and not in the best way. Wait until the end of dinner, and only after asking permission from those present, and making sure that no one objects, you can smoke. If anyone objects, retire to the bar. And never use plates as an ashtray.

Birthdays, weddings, anniversaries, corporate parties - there are many bright events in our lives. And unfortunately, at a feast in honor of some of them, one can feel awkward. But how I would like every holiday to be fun and relaxed.

The reasons that put us in this position can be very different - from the banal inability to behave at the table to more complex ones: differences in education, in worldview, an unusual environment, an alien number of appliances and previously unfamiliar dishes.

But no matter what happens, the culture of behavior is the same for everyone. And adhering to its simple rules, you can impress a well-mannered person on all, without exception, companions.

Try to follow the rules of etiquette even alone with yourself, and it will become easier for you to follow them in the presence of others!

How to behave at a dinner party

It is better to leave the phone and other personal items in the hallway or wardrobe so as not to be distracted by them during the evening. Pay more attention to the guests and the person who invited you.

Even on the threshold, remember the cherished words of courtesy: thank you, please, Bon appetit, Sorry. Feel free to wield them throughout the event.

Watch how you sit

When you sit down at the table, whether at the very beginning of dinner or in the middle, do not move your chair closer to it. Just put it so that you take a comfortable position for you right away. Ideally, one hand should fit between you and the countertop.

Don't put your elbows on the table! If young people are unlikely to notice such an omission, then this gesture will certainly not flash past the eyes of the adult generation.

During breaks, i.e. between meals, keep your hands in your lap or on the armrests.

The most elementary gesture of politeness is not to start a meal until the inviter himself has started it. It is not difficult to comply with it, but if the owner insists that the guests do not wait for him, support his desire.

Keep an even posture, you can not lean on anything and lean towards the plate. Food should be brought to the mouth, not the other way around. Try to look casual.

Stretching your legs, reaching for an alluring dish is also not worth it. By such actions, you can interfere with your companions and give the impression of an absolutely ill-mannered person. It is better to ask for something closer to the sitting guests.

The true purpose of a cloth napkin

The first thing to do when sitting down at the table is to unfold the cloth napkin and place it on your lap. Unfolded or folded in half if it is too large.

Just don't plug it in your shirt collar, it's considered bad manners in modern society and only suitable for small children.

Do not try to wipe your hands and mouth with a cloth napkin, it is designed to protect your holiday attire from accidentally spilled liquids and dropped pieces of food. And hands should be cleaned with ordinary paper ones.

If there is no paper version, most likely the owner combined their purpose. In this case, follow how he does and do the same.

Talented handling of devices

Remember that the spoon and knife must be held with the right hand, the fork with the left. If you fold the appliances crosswise, the owner will understand that you have decided to pause. And if you lay it parallel and slightly diagonally, you are ready to serve the next dish. These are simple rules of table etiquette, without which you can not do at any event.

To make a positive impression on others, follow simple rules during the meal:

It is necessary to eat slowly and carefully, even if it is very tasty! Chomping and slurping will instantly elevate you to the list of ill-mannered people.

Soft foods, such as scrambled eggs and some fish, should be eaten with a fork without a knife.

Never choose the best appetizing piece from a shared plate. Take the one closest to you.
Cut meat, game and fish in stages. It's not nice to cut them into pieces right away!
You can’t reach for a far-standing dish, ask those who are sitting closer to serve it.
Don't try to chew too much big chunks food. They should be small in size to be able to keep up the conversation in time.
Don't blow on hot food, let it cool down while you enjoy the conversation.
Always eat with your mouth closed! Even at home, to get used to and not to forget during a dinner party.

Do not eat with a knife, this is a sign of bad manners and bad taste.
When you want to pour a drink from a carafe for yourself, first offer it to your interlocutors. This also applies to general meals.
Don't give more food than you can handle. It is better to report several times.
Tilt the bowl of soup away from you, not vice versa. And ideally, leave it half-eaten.
Don't talk with your mouth full, apologize politely, and chew your food.

Remove the bone stuck in your mouth with a fork and discreetly transfer it to a paper napkin.
If you find hair or something else in the dish while visiting, do not express your dissatisfaction. Just put it on the edge of your plate and cover it with a side dish so that the rest of the guests do not notice.
You can not keep devices on weight during the conversation.
Do not place your spoon, fork or knife on a clean tablecloth during or after the meal. Keep them in a bowl.
If you urgently need to leave the table, tactfully apologize to either the interlocutor, or, if there is none, the nearest neighbor.

Do not drink solid food! Chew well, swallow, blot your lips with a napkin and only then drink.
Pick up only as much food on the fork as it can freely fit on it. It can be less, the main thing is that it does not fall off.
It is absolutely unacceptable to collect the remains of the sauce, for example, with the help of bread.
Do not lick appliances and move dirty dishes to the side.

And be careful with gestures, otherwise you risk knocking something over on your companion.

Remember to politely apologize to your tablemates if:

Need to leave urgently.
The phone rang.
You need to clear your throat, and it's too late to leave.
The hiccups started abruptly.
You suddenly became ill.
Suffering from digestive problems.

How to show gratitude before leaving

At the end of the evening, sincerely thank the person who organized it. Say how pleasant it was for you to be in his company, praise the choice and taste qualities dishes.