Rules for the behavior of children at the table. Lessons in etiquette and good manners

For 7 centuries in a row it has been believed that the main indicator of a person's upbringing is his ability to behave at the table. The word "etiquette" originated during the reign of the world famous French king Louis XIV. Guests invited to his banquet received a label card in their hands, on which they signed the rules of conduct. The word "etiquette" came from the name of this very card. In this article, we will take a closer look at modern rules of etiquette at the table with a photo.

There are two main ways to use cutlery:

Continental(common in Asian and European countries): the knife and fork should be kept in hand until the meal is over.
American, according to which it is permissible to put the knife aside if you are not going to use it temporarily (in this case, it is placed on a serving plate with the tip inward, the handle on the edge).

Consider the classic version table etiquette how to use cutlery. The main points are presented below:

How to use forks:

if the fork is long, it has 4 cloves, and it lies to the left of the plate, then this is a dinner fork - you need to eat the main course with it (the snack fork looks exactly the same, but its size is much smaller - you need to choose it when you are served cold snacks) ;
a fork with 4 cloves and recesses, which is somewhat smaller in length than a dining fork, is used to eat fish dishes (the cloves are designed to separate the bones from the meat);
the dessert fork is thin and small, instead of 4 cloves it has 3;
there is also a special fork to eat fruit, it does not look like a dessert fork, but it does not have 3 cloves, but 2.

How to use spoons:

a large tablespoon, lying to the right of the serving plate, is designed to eat soups and other liquid hot dishes with it;
a dessert spoon is designed to eat gluten-free sweet dishes that do not need to be cut with a knife (it has a long handle and a small cup);
a teaspoon is served exclusively with hot tea, and a coffee spoon (it is the smallest) is only served with black coffee.

How to use knives:

a knife that is turned with a blade to the plate, in addition, it is located on the right - this is a device designed to eat second hot dishes;
the fish knife is blunt, it looks more like a “shovel”, its purpose is not to cut, but to hold the fish in order to remove bones from it with a fork;
the knife for snacks and desserts has a small shape, in addition, it has teeth on the blade.

If you can’t keep all this information in your head, then remember one secret how to use cutlery: they are always placed on the table in the order in which they need to be used. Always take the most extreme devices initially. After you finish your first course, these utensils will be taken away from you along with an empty plate.

Now let's figure out what to do with appliances after eating according to the rules of etiquette at the table:

if you have already finished eating, you need to fold the fork and knife so that they are parallel to each other with cloves and point up (fork on the left, and knife on the right);
if you are delighted with the dish you have eaten and want to signal this, it is not necessary to run to the chef, place the knife and fork on the plate parallel to each other, but so that the cloves are directed to the right (the fork must be placed on top, and the knife under it) - the waiter will see this and convey your admiration to the author of the culinary masterpiece;
if you decide to pause during the meal, then place the fork and knife on the plate with the tip to each other (outwardly, it should look like the fork and knife form the letter “L”);
if you have finished the first dish and are waiting for the second, place the knife on the plate so that its blade is directed to the left, and place the fork perpendicular to the knife with the teeth up.

How to behave at the table in a restaurant: rules of etiquette

In public establishments, such as a restaurant, you need to behave accordingly. Be sure to check in advance basic rules of table etiquette in a restaurant, so that you are perceived as a person from high society:

If a man invited a woman to dinner, then he must enter the restaurant first. If there is a porter in the restaurant at the entrance, then the man is obliged to let the lady go forward, help her take off her outer clothes, take her to the table, ask her where she wants to sit, move the chair away so that the lady sits on it.
The man should sit either in front of the lady, or on the left side of her.
Dinner must be ordered by the person who initiated it. Usually it's a man. He can only offer the woman to choose something from what he personally chose. According to table etiquette, girl she should not be capricious, talk about her illnesses, that she went on a diet or became a vegetarian. It is necessary to politely choose something from what her companion offers her.

A person sitting at a table in a restaurant should watch their posture. The back should be even, but at the same time it should not seem from the outside that you are uncomfortable. Be at ease, confident, but do not relax.
Immediately place a napkin on your lap to sit on your serving plate.
If it so happened that you were brought a dish earlier than your companion, do not start eating it. Wait until the food is served to all participants in the meal.
If a woman has made up lips, then she needs to go to the ladies' room to get rid of lipstick, because traces of it on the dishes are considered a sign of bad taste. And in general, any hygiene procedures at the restaurant table cannot be done. For these purposes, go to the toilet. But before you leave the table, you need to apologize.
It is not allowed to take pictures of food and drinks during a meal in a restaurant. Such behavior is considered immoral in high-level establishments.
If you come across something inedible in a dish, carefully remove it from your mouth, but not with your hands, but with a spoon.
If some cutlery accidentally fell from your table to the floor, you do not need to pick it up. Call the waiter and ask him to bring you others.
If a very hot dish is brought to you, wait until it cools down. You can’t blow on food, serbat, and generally make some sounds in a restaurant. It's not good, according to table etiquette rules.

The fork must be held with the left hand during the meal, and the knife with the right. If the dish can be eaten with an ordinary fork, nothing needs to be cut, then it can be held in the right hand.
If you eat meat, then cut off one small piece from it, which you will immediately eat. Cut slices should not remain on the plate.
To eat pasta, you need to use a fork. Pasta is wrapped around it. If the dish is buried in the sauce, it is preferable to use a spoon.
If there is a bread product on the plate with your dish, then you need to break off slices from it and eat them gradually. It is impossible to bite off a whole piece of bread or take it in hand.
You need to chew food with your mouth completely closed.
If you haven't finished your soup, it's okay. Yushka at the bottom of a soup bowl is considered the norm. If you want to finish eating, then tilt the plate away from you and scoop out the soup with a spoon.
Don't lean too far over the plate. You must carefully bring the fork or spoon with food to your mouth.
If you have something stuck in your mouth, do not remove anything with your hands. Use a fork, preferably at a time when no one sees it.

Hide your phone somewhere so it doesn't bother you. If he calls all the time, it will look impolite. In this case, pick up the phone and ask to call you back later. Excuse yourself if you need to clear your nose or clear your throat and leave the table.
Do not pass the dish, salt or pepper directly into the hands of the person who asked you for it. It will be right if you just put the item or food he needs next to his plate.
Behave at the table calmly, do not gesticulate, so as not to accidentally break something.
In no case should you put your elbows on the table. Hands should not touch the table at all while eating. Women are only allowed to lean slightly against the table with their hands.
Bags, wallets, phones and other things should also not be left on the table.
During the meal, you can communicate with a companion, but on those topics that will not provoke a scandal between you or disputes.
After the meal is over, do not leave the dishes. Everything should remain on the table as it is.
Do not forget to leave a tip to the waiter after dinner (this is about 10% of the total bill). If the tip is included in the amount of the check, then it is not necessary to leave additional money.

How to behave at the table at a party: rules of etiquette

When you come to someone's house, even if you were invited by your close friends, this does not mean that in this case it is not necessary to observe table etiquette rules. Be sure to show respect to the hosts and leave a good impression.

Of course, such strict requirements are not imposed on you, as in a restaurant, but a few etiquette rules, how to behave at the table while visiting, you still need to know:

do not sit down at the table until you are invited to do so by the owners of the house;
if you need any cutlery, or you are asked to pass it, remember to do this in a counterclockwise direction;
do not eat with your fork or spoon from a common dish into which, for example, a salad is poured - take a special cutlery and pour the dish off your plate;
if the dish is far from you, do not reach for it across the entire table, but ask the person sitting next to you to serve it;
drink water or an alcoholic beverage only after you have completely chewed your food;
do not talk at the table on political or religious topics, do not discuss diseases, but do not be silent, do not force the owners of the house to entertain you;
do not stay at a party until late in the evening (the optimal time to stay at a party is 2-3 hours);
after dinner, be sure to thank the owners of the house.

How to behave at the buffet according to the rules of etiquette?

Everyone knows what a buffet is when a lot of dishes are presented, and everyone can choose whatever they want and as much as they want.

It would seem that everything is simple, however, here it is necessary to observe 5 rules of table etiquette:

As soon as you enter a buffet restaurant, look around to understand where and what is located. In many establishments, first courses are located separately from appetizers and desserts. Think about what you would like to eat so as not to overload the stomach with everything at once. Take the plate in your left hand, and lay everything with your right. If you need bread, then you need to take a special small plate for it.
It is not allowed to appear at the buffet in a swimsuit or street clothes. An elegant dress is, of course, also not the best option for a buffet, but the fact that your appearance should be neat is unequivocal.
When helping yourself to a dish, behave with restraint, do not shout, do not push, and do not make a fuss if the dish you wanted to take is over. Step aside, wait a few minutes for the waiters to bring the food you want. Try to make only one approach to the buffet.
After you finish your meal, clean up after yourself. In many buffet restaurants, the waiters do not clean up after the customers.
Do not try to take food from the buffet with you, unless it is provided for by the establishment.

Basic rules of table etiquette for children

As soon as your child turns one year old, you can teach him the rules of table manners. At first, the baby will take an example from mom and dad, so it is important that the parents themselves behave correctly during the meal.

What should the child pay attention to:

Wash your hands thoroughly with soap and water before every meal. By the age of two, the crumbs should already develop the habit of observing the rules of hygiene.
The child must know his place at the table. If he is still small, then parents need to seat him in his chair, which should correspond to the height of the common dining table. It is better to place the chair on the left side of the mother so that she can help the child when necessary.
The meal should take place every day at the same time, so that the baby develops a regimen and culture of proper nutrition.
Explain to the baby that you need to start eating after all family members sit down at the table, and the phrase “bon appetit” will sound.
Up to three years, you need to teach a child to use a spoon, up to 5 years - a fork, and after 5 years it is already possible to explain what a knife is and how to handle it. Don't let your child dig into the food with their hands. If he can't handle the kitchen appliance, feed him yourself.

Explain to the baby that you can’t play, sing, dance and talk loudly at the table, especially if your mouth is full of food. After all, it is not only indecent, but also dangerous to health.
Teach your baby that everything that he poured, he must eat. Spitting food back on the plate is not allowed, as it is ugly.
The kid should already know at the age of three that after a meal you need to carefully wipe your mouth with handles, and say “thank you” to the one who cooked the food.
Explain to the baby that you can get up from the table only after he is allowed by adults.
You can use innovative technologies in the process of teaching your child. On the Internet, you can download educational cartoons and pictures, with the help of which the child will figure out in a playful and cognitive way what to do while eating. Great way to learn rules of table etiquette - creating a presentation on this topic on a computer (suitable for you if your child is already 5 years old). So the child will be more interesting, because the craving for computer technology in modern children manifests itself at a very early age.

In the modern program of secondary educational institutions, a course is provided for schoolchildren about the rules of etiquette at the table. At the lessons, children are told about the norms of behavior in public places, and in particular, special attention is paid to the topic of how to behave at the table.

Rules of etiquette at the table in pictures

Try to follow all the recommendations that we have given you in this article if you want to be accepted as a well-mannered and cultured person in public institutions. Remember that ignorance and frivolous behavior even while eating is a sign, first of all, of disrespect for yourself, and only then for others. Therefore, behave appropriately so as not to fall "face in the dirt."

Video: "Rules of etiquette at the table"

This question is asked by people at different ages. By the behavior and ability to use devices, one can judge the culture and upbringing of a person. At all times, special attention was paid to table etiquette. Its rules were not invented in one day, they were formed and changed over the centuries.

All the rules for the use of plates and the position on the table of appliances - forks, spoons, knives, were carefully thought out, based on the convenience and freedom of movement of a person at the table. Knowledge of the laws of etiquette makes it possible to feel confident not only among friends, but also at a social event. All the subtleties of restaurant etiquette at the table can be easily comprehended in courses on food culture and etiquette. There are also differences in the rules of eating, primarily based on folk traditions, customs, tastes and peculiarities of national cuisine.

Family Etiquette

Even in the circle of the closest relatives, it is necessary to follow the rules of the culture of eating. The elders should sit at the table first, and only then the younger members of the family. Men, in turn, sit down at the table after all the ladies have sat down. You can’t start a meal until the head of the family has started it.

Eating does not accept the speedy eating of all the food on the plate. Talking with a full mouth, waving arms and cutlery, reading a book while eating, reaching across the table for a piece of cheese is considered a complete lack of manners. You can’t get up from the table earlier if the rest of the participants in the feast have not finished the meal.

It is very important in the process of eating to keep your back straight, you need to sit straight, your elbows should not be on the table. Remember that when communicating during a feast, in no case should you turn away from the interlocutors sitting on both sides. It is also not recommended to communicate with anyone through a neighbor.

Paper complications

The napkin, usually nicely folded, shouldn't scare you. Before eating, unfold it and place it on your knees. Only lips and fingers can be wiped with a napkin. Do not wipe your face with it or put it in your pocket at the end of the meal. Roll it up and place it on the side of your plate. If the napkin is on the floor, you do not need to pick it up.

How to use cutlery

Each cutlery has its own function. The spoon should be between the thumb and forefinger. It is not recommended to eat with a spoon those dishes that can be eaten with a fork, for example, side dishes, desserts,
casseroles, etc. A fork should be used to take food from a plate, a knife can be used to touch up food on a plate, and a dish cannot be cut into small pieces to facilitate eating using only a fork. When chewing food, do not wave and gesticulate with a knife and fork, their ends should be directed downward, perpendicular or at an acute angle to the plate.

Cross your fork and knife on your plate when you want to take a slice of bread or change cutlery. When you have finished eating, the plate does not need to be moved or removed. Fold the cutlery diagonally on the plate - this will symbolize the end of the meal.

First course

There are many nuances associated with eating soup. Do not pour a full bowl of soup, eating it in this case is very inconvenient. You can’t blow on the soup, etiquette allows you to only stir it slightly in a bowl for a very short time.

You need to eat soup from the tip of a spoon, which should be brought parallel to your mouth. Keep your thumb on the handle of the spoon. Eating soup to the last drop is considered extremely indecent, leave some liquid at the bottom of the plate and deflect it away from you, filling the spoon with soup. At the end of the first course, the spoon should remain on the plate. Do not lick and wipe the spoon with a napkin.

Also, you can’t keep a piece of bread in your hand all the time, according to the rules of etiquette, you need to break off small pieces. It is not necessary to spread butter on bread by weight, it is customary to put it on a plate, holding it with your left hand, and spread butter with a knife.

Second course

It is also necessary to be able to eat second or hot dishes correctly. You can not hold the handles of a knife or fork in your fingers, hold them exclusively in your palms. Place your index finger on the base of the knife, in front of the blade. When you are about to cut food, hold your fork and knife at an acute angle, not perpendicular to the table.

Fish and seafood

Cutlery for fish and seafood is smaller than cutlery. Fish follows
cut with a knife and fork, slowly separating small bones on the edge of the plate. It is unacceptable to cut the fish with a knife or try to break it with a fork. Sometimes the bone is on the tongue, in this case, do not spit it into a plate, slowly remove it from your mouth onto a fork and put it on a plate. It is customary to eat seafood with a special fork with two cloves and a sharp knife with a small hole in the blade. Etiquette allows you to eat small crustaceans and shrimp with your hands, but snail meat can only be removed with special tongs, carefully holding the shell with a knife.

Poultry should not be eaten by hand or with a fork. A piece should be held with a fork, cutting small slices with a knife from the bone.

Dessert

Cutlery for a variety of desserts is considered especially tricky. Their handles are directed to the right or left, and they are taken according to the direction of the handle, in the right or left hand.

If there is no need to cut a dish, then use only a fork, holding it in your right hand. Help yourself hold dessert with a slice of bread. A special fork is also used to eat asparagus, although some "experts" claim that it can be eaten with your hands. This is an outdated opinion, since since the beginning of the 20th century, asparagus has not been taken off the plate. For tea and coffee, special mugs are used; you should not pour a hot drink to the brim, you risk getting burned.

Knowledge of etiquette is not only a mandatory skill, but also an opportunity to make a lasting impression on others with noble manners and pleasant appearance.

Nuances

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Agree, there has been a situation in everyone's life when you feel awkward at the table. This may be due to a certain society where you ended up, the situation, a huge number of appliances on the table. You just don't know where to start, how to sit, what is appropriate or inappropriate to say, how to get out of awkward situations. Remember the episode from the movie "Titanic", a simple guy Jack falls into a refined society, not knowing which fork to start with, he feels a little embarrassed. He asks the question - "Is all this for me?"

So, the correct behavior at the table speaks of the general cultural level of a person. Someone culture of behavior at the table and in society is instilled from childhood, someone simply does not know everything. Let's figure out together the rules of etiquette at the table, as well as how not to get confused in all this.

Etiquette rules exist to ensure that everyone present feels comfortable. Therefore, first of all, pay attention to your attitude to what is happening - be polite, include "magic words" in your speech - "thank you", "please", "I'm sorry", "I'm sorry", etc.

And if you try to follow the simple rules of behavior at the table at home, then this will definitely become a habit, and when you come to a restaurant, you will easily behave “as you should” without hesitation.

There are several basic rules of table etiquette:

You need to sit straight, do not stoop your back, do not bend over the plate, try to look at ease. It is not recommended to sit too far from the edge of the table or too close and rest your elbows on the table. By doing this, you can embarrass your neighbor. It is not supposed to reach across the table - the waiter can put the dish on the plate.
Always say the words "please" and "thank you."
When you sit down at the table, put a napkin on your knees.
Women are invited to the table first, men sit next.
If this is a festive event, being late is considered a manifestation of disrespect and your bad manners.
While eating, you can not put your elbows on the table - only the hands should lie on the table.
If food was brought to you earlier than others, wait until everyone has plates - only then can you start eating. You can start eating earlier than others only if the owners do not mind.
While eating, the fork must be held in the left hand, and the knife in the right, but if you ordered a dish that is eaten only with a fork, then hold it in your right hand. Do not take a fork, knife or spoon too close to the base.
You cannot take with a spoon what you can take with a fork.
You can take on a fork as much as it fits on it without falling off.
Pasta and other pasta are eaten by twisting with a fork and helping with a spoon.
Dough products and bread must be carefully broken off and there are broken pieces, you can not cut bread or bite off.
If you suddenly drop any device, ask the waiter to bring you a new one, if you are at home, take or offer a clean device to the guest
Food should be chewed with the mouth closed. In no case do not slurp, even if it tastes sooo delicious to you.
Do not eat with a knife - this is a sign of bad taste.
If you pour yourself a drink from a common container, offer it to your interlocutors first, and then pour yourself.
If serving food from a common plate, bring your own plate and put as much as you can eat, don't forget about the guests, offer them a dish too.
You can tilt the bowl with the leftovers of the soup, but only away from you, but it is better to leave the soup a little undereaten.
It is necessary to cut off such a piece of food so that you can eat it at a time.
There are several taboos at the table: do not speak with a full mouth and do not drink drinks.
If a piece of food is accidentally stuck in your mouth, it is taken out with a fork and placed on a plate (it is desirable that no one sees).
During a conversation, you can’t hold a fork or a spoon with food on weight, especially swing it - eat it or put it on a plate.
Do not lean too far towards the plate, bring food to your mouth, if you drink tea or coffee, it is also necessary to bring the cup to your lips.
During or after a meal, cutlery should never be placed on the table - put them on a plate.
Cutlery is used in a certain order - starting from the extreme, moving closer to the plate.
If you are expecting a change of dishes and have stopped eating yet, cutlery must be placed crosswise (so that the sharp part of the knife looks to the left, and the fork with the convex side up).
When you have finished, cutlery must be placed on a plate parallel to each other.
In no case should you lean over another person, you cannot reach out - ask to be given this or that dish.
If you need to go out while eating, apologize to your interlocutor.

When should you apologize?

If you need to blow your nose at the table.
If you need to clear your throat at the table.
If you need to get out.
If you have a piece of food stuck in your tooth and need to use a toothpick or floss.
If you suddenly started to hiccup.
If you feel that you have become ill.
If you have problems with the intestines or digestion at the table.

How to use a napkin correctly?

Just sitting down at the table, you need to put a napkin on your lap.
If the napkin is large, fold it in half before placing it on your lap.
If the napkin is small, it must be fully unfolded.
If you need to go out, put the napkin on the table to the right of the plate, hiding the soiled spots on it. Do not put a napkin on a chair - you can accidentally sit on it and get dirty.
Place your napkin to the left of your plate if you have already eaten.
For small children, the napkin is tucked into the collar.

How to behave at the table?

Do not bite off large pieces, the pieces should be of such a size that you can easily carry on a conversation at the table.
You can't blow on hot food. Let the dish cool while you wash your hands or start a conversation.
Salt and pepper must be passed together, even if you were asked to pass only the salt.
If you are asked to pass something at the table, do not pass it directly into your hands, but put it on the table next to the interlocutor. If your interlocutor is sitting far from you, you do not need to reach across the entire table, ask the person sitting next to you to pass the dish further.
At the table, moderate your gestures so as not to inadvertently hurt your interlocutor or knock over food.
Put your phone or other gadget in your pocket before starting a meal - it is undesirable to put it on the table.
The waiter needs to leave a tip in the amount of 10-15% of the amount of your order (unless, of course, they are not included in the price of the dishes and this is how it is accepted in one place or another).

By remembering these simple rules of table etiquette, you can easily and comfortably feel anywhere and in any company. Enjoy your meal!

Each of us would do well to brush up on the rules of etiquette at the table, and perhaps even learn something new about how to behave while eating. The most important rules of etiquette that absolutely everyone should use.

Each of us notices when someone in a cafe at a nearby table eats carelessly or stealthily wipes his hands on his knees. In the same way, other people notice our mistakes, any behavior is conspicuous and can cause embarrassment. Therefore, it is better to check yourself and correct your own behavior if necessary.

How to behave at the table

General rules apply to any situation, they will never be superfluous. The first thing we pay attention to when we see a person is his posture. Posture characterizes not only the behavior or condition of a person, but also reveals the secrets of his character.

An insecure person will fidget nervously on the edge of a chair, a notorious person will try to slouch in order to become less noticeable. Sit up straight, but in a way that is comfortable for you. Hands can be placed on the edge of the table or on your knees, and it is better to press your elbows to your sides.

By the way, in order to learn how to hold your elbows near the body in Soviet times, it was advised to periodically train - have lunch, holding a couple of weighty books to your elbows. This is necessary so that the correct bodily pattern is formed, and you keep your elbows flawlessly even when you don’t think about it at all.

The rules of table etiquette imply almost all situations that can happen to a person and give a clear recommendation on how to act in a given situation.

Naturally, table etiquette at home and restaurant etiquette are somewhat different. However, there are rules that are appropriate in any situation:

do not speak too loudly;
do not take a fork or spoon with food too far from the mouth;
you can not make sounds while eating;
eat calmly, without undue haste.

Restaurant

The rules of conduct in a restaurant imply some composure - you need to behave correctly and with dignity in order to make a good impression on others.

A man must let the lady go first, but if a company of men or women goes to the restaurant, then everyone is on an equal footing or rely on the initiator of the dinner.
If several people are to meet at dinner, and someone is late, then by mutual agreement with the rest of the guests, you can wait for those who are late for about a quarter of an hour. A longer wait is a sign of disrespect for guests who arrived on time.
If you happened to be late, then you should apologize, and then just join the others. You should not draw special attention to the fact of being late and explain the reason, just join in the table conversation.
During a meeting of a man and a woman in a restaurant, a man should read the menu and offer his companion any dishes. For a girl in this case, expressing her indifference is a sign of bad manners. Etiquette in a restaurant implies the participation of a lady in the choice of dishes.
In a restaurant, you should not conduct a conversation in raised tones and laugh out loud. If this happened by accident, it makes sense to apologize to other visitors and be quieter. Observe table etiquette, and if someone behaves inappropriately at the next table, then this should be reported to the waiter.
You need to start eating when the waiter brought out the ordered dishes to all those present. If a person who is waiting for his dish to be prepared does not mind, he can make an offer to others to start eating.
It is strictly forbidden to engage in hygiene procedures at the table - wipe your face, neck and hands with napkins, comb your hair or tint your lips. If you need to pay attention to your appearance, it is better to do it in a special room. Dining etiquette also does not welcome traces of lipstick on dishes. Before you start eating, the girl should carefully remove the lipstick with a napkin.
Any interaction with food also looks uncivilized - food is on the table in order to eat it. Taking photos for Instagram, blowing on the soup, meticulously poking around in the salad, commenting on the ingredients - is indecent.
If you come across a cartilage or a bone in some dish, you need to carefully return the inedible element back to the spoon and move it to a plate (or napkin).

How to handle appliances

In no case should you check the cleanliness of the appliances, and if you still notice a cloudy spot on the fork or spoon, you need to quietly draw the attention of the waiter to this oversight and politely ask for a replacement.
In most restaurants, the table is set in advance, and cutlery is laid out on both sides of the serving plate.
Do not get lost if there are more dishes on the table than you expected to see - everything has its own purpose, and if you are in doubt about which fork or spoon you should take, you can always see how other guests solve this problem.
Those devices that lie on the left of the plate are used with the left hand, and those that are laid out on the right must be held in the right hand.
With complex serving, each dish relies on its own devices, so if you are in doubt which fork should be taken, take the far one - the one that is furthest from the edge of the plate. As you change dishes, you will gradually approach the nearest appliances.
The knife is used either for cutting food, or for spreading pates and butter (for example, during breakfasts). You should not try pieces from a knife.
Cut meat or fish should be sequentially, as it is eaten. Cutting the whole portion at once is a bad form. It is generally accepted that this way the dish cools down faster and loses its main flavors.

Learn in advance a few differences between different cutlery, so as not to get into a mess.

Forks

second hot dishes are eaten with a table fork, it has four cloves, and in length it is slightly inferior to the diameter of the plate and is placed on the left;
a fish fork is used for hot fish dishes, it looks smaller than a diner and has four short cloves, a fish fork is easy to recognize by its recesses - they are needed to separate the bones;
snack fork - a reduced duplicate of a table fork, they eat cold snacks with it;
dessert fork - for pies, small, corresponds to the size of a dessert plate and looks atypical;
a fruit fork equipped with two prongs, usually served with a fruit knife;
the remaining forks are considered auxiliary, they are placed next to the dish that they need to eat.

Knives

any second hot dishes are eaten with a table knife, it is placed to the right of the plate, the blade is turned to the plate;
a fish knife is blunt and resembles a spatula, used to separate the flesh of the fish from the bones;
the snack knife is small and has teeth;
dessert and fruit knife look similar - they are the smallest.

spoons

a tablespoon - the largest, lies to the right of the plate;
a dessert spoon is served with a dessert that does not require cutting - soft puddings, jellies and whipped cream;
an ice cream spoon is served with a bowl;
the cocktail spoon has a very narrow and long handle;
a teaspoon can be served with any hot drink;
coffee spoon - the smallest, served only with black coffee.

Dialogue and table manners

Table etiquette includes not only the use of utensils, proper positioning and good posture, but also the manner in which dialogues and conversations are conducted.

It is worth noting that table etiquette categorically prohibits discussing provocative issues that can lead to a serious conflict - therefore, one should refrain from commenting on money, politics and religion.

How to behave at the table and what to say? Be sure to look at the person who is addressing you, listen without interrupting, and only then answer. If you think some questions of the interlocutor are inappropriate for a meal, delicately offer to discuss this a little later. In all other cases, the answer should be easy and unconstrained.

The rules of etiquette in a restaurant do not imply violent disputes either - refrain from inappropriate comments and lighten the mood with a cute joke if someone else raises their voice.

You should not talk only together, involve the rest of the participants in the meal. For example, if the conversation turned to a recent vacation, you can ask one of the interlocutors if he is going to go on vacation in the near future or what places he prefers to relax.

It is also good form in any table conversation to praise the host, chef or initiator of the meeting - find a few kind words to note the general atmosphere of the evening.

A short course in etiquette

Do what the majority does.
Don't point out to others their mistakes, in the most extreme case, this can be said quietly in an undertone and only to your neighbor on the table.
Don't miss your meal for too long.
Leaving the table - apologize.
Try everything and eat what you like.
Diet, eating disorders, restrictions on alcoholic beverages and diet are not discussed at the common table.

Some rules of conduct at the table are best studied by looking at the pictures - look at the basic table setting patterns, you can also watch the video on how to properly hold this or that device.

Table etiquette is not that difficult if you give it a little time, and following all the rules will help you present your best side.

The rules of conduct at the table in a restaurant are not fundamentally different from the rules of conduct at the table in general. Is that there are some features due to the situation. Knowing the rules of etiquette will help you feel comfortable and confident.

Staying at the table should be relaxed, but not cheeky. Sitting on a chair should be straight, do not fall apart, do not put your elbows on the table. It is not recommended to sit too close to the table or too far away from it.

You should talk with a neighbor (neighbor) on the table without turning your whole body towards him, so as not to turn your back on another neighbor. It is not customary to get acquainted, as well as to talk with someone through a neighbor. You should also not ask a neighbor to serve something if there is a waiter nearby. If there is no waiter, then such requests are acceptable.

Sit so that the distance to the table is equal to the size of your palm.

You can move away from the table a little in the pause between dishes or after the serving of dishes is finished.

You need to take a napkin and, unfolding it, put it on your knees in order to protect the dress or suit from drops, crumbs. After eating, the napkin is placed on the table to the right of the plate in expanded form.

Sit straight, somewhat relaxed, press your elbows to the body and do not take them to the sides.

Do not put your elbows on the table, even if you smoke and it is convenient for you to lean on the table with your elbow.

It is not customary to blow on the broth, bend over the plate of another, take salt or mustard with your knife, use a toothpick, etc.

A person who accidentally drops a knife or fork should pretend that nothing happened and calmly ask for another one. Surrounding also should not attach any importance to what happened. This is one of the manifestations of tact and delicacy.

You should not wipe your hands on the tablecloth, knock with a spoon or fork on a plate, smell the dishes served, criticize a dish you don’t like aloud, make harsh remarks and express your displeasure.

You can not eat from a common dish that is intended for several people. You should put the food on your plate with a special spoon and fork, but not the one you eat.

You can start drinking only after a common toast. Clinking glasses when making a toast, especially in large companies, is not necessary. Pouring wine to the lady sitting on the right should be done with the left hand, turning slightly to the right. If a new bottle has just been opened, the man should first pour some wine for himself and then for the lady. Glasses and glasses should not be filled to the brim, but two-thirds of their capacity. So it is more convenient to drink from them.

If after the toast they clink glasses, then the man should keep his glass lower than the lady's glass. You should not drink a full glass of wine at once, just sip. Do not top up a glass if all the wine has not been drunk from it. A person who does not want to drink more, when offered to fill his glass, may refuse, politely thanking. Do not close the glass with your hand or any object.

It is tactless to force a guest or table neighbor to drink wine.

You can’t use a comb at the table, you can powder and tint your lips only after you finish eating. At the table, a woman can sit in a hat, but gloves must be removed.

It is indecent to drum your fingers on the table, gesticulate, play with a napkin, a glass, a knife and other cutlery. In no case should you hum or whistle at the table.

While eating, the left hand rests naturally on the edge of the table (however, the forearm and elbow cannot be placed on the table). The knife is in the right hand, the fork in the left, while the fingers should not be on the back of the knife or on the teeth of the fork. The knife should never be brought to the mouth.

When cutting food, the fork must be held at an angle, and not perpendicular to the plate, otherwise the fork may slip off the plate, resulting in the food being on the table. When you have finished eating, put your fork and knife on the plate, not on the tablecloth.

The first courses, served either in a deep plate or in a broth cup, are usually eaten with a dessert spoon, with the left hand holding the handle of the cup while eating.

With a knife that cuts meat, they do not take salt from the salt shaker, food from a common dish.

Do not cut several pieces at once, it is better to take turns.

If you have to temporarily interrupt the meal in order to drink water, take bread, put the knife and fork on the plate as they were held: the knife with the handle to the right, and the fork to the left.

After finishing the meal, put the knife and fork on the plate.

If someone asks to pass the device, then pass the knives, forks, spoons with the handle forward, taking the device by the middle.

You can’t put food on a neighbor’s (neighbor’s) plate if he refuses it. You can refuse meals without giving a reason. It is extremely indecent to hint at the table about poor digestion or any other ailments.

You need to chew food with your mouth closed, silently. It is not necessary to finish a glass of wine or eat any dish to the end.

Bread should be taken with your hand, not with a fork. It is not customary to bite off a whole piece. Bread is eaten in small pieces, which are broken off over their plate. It is not customary to crumble bread into soup, use it to put food on a fork. You can't butter a whole piece of bread either. You should gradually break off pieces of bread and spread each of them.

Soup is eaten slowly, silently, not from the end of the spoon. Dumplings, noodles, potatoes and other seasonings, if they are in the soup, need to be crushed with the edge of a spoon. It is not recommended to tilt the bowl of soup.

Broths are sometimes served in cups with one or two handles. From a cup with one handle, the contents can be drunk, from a cup with two handles, you should eat with a dessert spoon.

Fish dishes, both hot and cold, are eaten with a special fish utensil. If not, use a fork. You can use a knife to separate the bones. If a bone gets into your mouth, you should carefully and, if possible, unobtrusively remove it with a fork or hand and put it on the edge of the plate. You can't spit bones on a plate. The fish is not cut with a knife.

Meat dishes (roast, schnitzel, chops, steak, rump steak, liver, etc.) are eaten with a knife and fork. You should not cut the meat on a plate into small pieces, you need to gradually cut off a small piece from it.

Cutlets, chopped steak, cabbage rolls, dumplings, meatballs, kebab and other similar foods should be eaten with a fork, helping with a knife; it is not customary to cut them with a knife. If the meat is easily separated with a fork, it is not recommended to use a knife at all.

Poultry dishes are eaten with a fork and knife. It is indecent to eat with your hands and gnaw at the bones.

Boiled eggs are eaten with a spoon, scrambled eggs or scrambled eggs (without ham) - with a fork, helping with a knife.

Butter, caviar, pate are put with a knife on a plate and only then spread on bread. If there is no special butter knife, use any other knife that is at hand.

Sandwiches are taken by hand if they are served with drinks before lunch (dinner). However, at the table, sandwiches are eaten with a fork and knife.

Salad is eaten with a fork. The knife is allowed to be used for cutting large pieces or lettuce leaves.

Salt is taken from the salt shaker with a clean knife, if there is no special spoon.

Apples and pears are put on a plate, cut into quarters or halves with a fruit knife, and then eaten with a fork and knife or taken by hand. Sometimes these fruits are peeled.

Peaches are cut with a fruit knife from top to bottom and broken in half. The bones are removed with a knife, and then one half is taken by hand and eaten.

Bananas are peeled and eaten in the hand. If bananas are sliced, they are eaten with a spoon.

Oranges are peeled and the white fibrous shell is removed with a knife, then divided into slices, which are taken by hand. The bones are taken out of the mouth with a spoon and placed on a plate.

Watermelons and melons are usually served sliced, with peel. They are eaten with a fork and knife.

A tea or coffee spoon serves only to stir the sugar, after which it must be placed on a saucer, and if it is very deep, rest on its edge.

You should not help yourself with a spoon even at the first sips of coffee or tea. If it is hot, wait patiently until it cools down, do not blow into a cup or glass. Do not take a saucer in hand, you can only lift a cup or glass.

It is not customary to drink tea and coffee from a saucer. The cup should be held by the ear, without passing the index finger through it and without leaving the little finger.

The coffee grounds are left in the cup.

Sugar in the absence of special tweezers is taken by hand, not with a spoon.

A slice of lemon in a glass can be carefully squeezed out with a spoon, and then put on a plate, but it is better to leave it in a glass. Lemon pulled out of tea should not be eaten.

If tea leaves are served in bags, then, having received the desired infusion, remove the bag and put it on a saucer.

If you drink a drink through a straw, then in such cases you should not suck it out to the last drop.

Jam and jelly are spread on bread with a knife, not a fork.

When you drink tea or coffee with a cake, especially if the latter is with cream, you need to be careful not to leave greasy marks on the edge of the glass. It is best to eat a cake so as not to stain your lips with cream. But if it doesn’t work out, you can wipe your lips with a napkin every time before you take a sip of tea or coffee. Biscuit cake is eaten with a dessert spoon. Sand or puff pastries are taken by hand. Leave a paper napkin on a plate after use.

If a cake (pie) is served, it must be eaten with a dessert knife and fork.

Ice cream is eaten with a dessert spoon or a teaspoon.

When can you smoke? The first, suitable moment for this is presented immediately after the order is placed - in anticipation of its implementation. But during dinner it is better not to smoke, especially when your companions are eating.

You can not smoke at the table without the permission of women. If you are still allowed, then extinguish cigarettes only in an ashtray and never do this in a plate or saucer.

It is tactless without the need to leave the table before the end of lunch or dinner.

After lunch or dinner, you should not rush to leave, but it is also not recommended to linger unnecessarily.

Some dishes are eaten with hands (asparagus, tobacco chicken, etc.).

It is customary to eat hot fish with the help of a special device or with one fork, holding it in the right hand and helping oneself with a piece of bread in the left.

The bones are stacked on the edge of the plate with a fork.

Salads served in small plates should be eaten without shifting to a large plate.

If fruits are served, they should first be peeled with a knife, cut into pieces, cut out the core with grains and only then eat.

If you need to fill a glass, take it with the thumb, index and middle fingers of your right hand and hand it to the person who pours.

After eating, you can touch your lips with a napkin and wipe your fingertips.

At the table, a witty and light conversation is preferable, you should not touch on sensitive topics or the question of the cost of food and drinks.

At the table it is considered impolite to whisper in the ear of your interlocutor.

Any conversation should be conducted in such a way as not to interfere with food.

It is desirable to talk at the table not only with your partner, but also with your closest neighbors.

If you need to say something to another person sitting behind your neighbor, then they say behind his back. The conversation "through a neighbor" should not be long, it can consist of a short remark or a joke.

Do not touch the interlocutor in order to attract his attention.

If during a conversation you want to sneeze, try to do it quietly and apologize to your interlocutor.

If one of those present sneezed, leave it unattended, no need to say: "Be healthy!".

If you cannot eat a certain dish, you do not need to tell the reasons, just refuse is enough.

The most suitable time to make a table speech or a toast is a break or a pause between dishes when those present at the table are not eating.

The person who wants to take the floor stands up, taps his glass lightly in order to attract the attention of the guests and begins to speak.

Before the start of the speech, the speaker may ask to fill the glasses.

The table speech ends with a toast.

The toast should not be long or frilly.

It is impolite to continue eating or talking to your neighbors while someone is making a speech.