Rules of conduct at the table: etiquette. Rules of conduct at the table briefly
Today we will talk about the rules of table setting, the existing norms of behavior during meals and the features of using various serving items. After all, you must admit that when you master this science, you feel much more confident in any company, on any journey, in any restaurant. I want to clarify that there are many styles, schools and rules, some even contradict each other. Here the factor of the country, institutions and traditions takes place. So I took one of the styles. So let's get started.
Start of lunch.
If you are a guest and there are no name cards on the table, remain standing until the host of the dinner indicates your place at the table.
Napkins.
As soon as you sit down at the table, put a napkin on your knees. It is customary to unfold the napkin in one smooth movement, shaking it in order to straighten it. How to put the napkin on your lap depends on the size of the napkin. There are two options: 1. Large napkins are usually served at more formal occasions, and in such cases it is customary to unfold the napkin halfway. 2. Smaller napkins are fully unfolded and completely cover the knees. Do not tuck the tissue in the collar, between shirt buttons, or in the waistband. If a dish is served that is customary to eat with your hands, look at the host of the dinner - and do the same as he (perhaps he will tuck a napkin under his chin, or tie it around his neck). Using a napkin. During lunch, use a tissue more often to blot your lips, but don't dry them. If there are also paper napkins on the table, it is permissible to wipe your lips with them. Be sure to blot your lips before drinking, this is especially true for women who use lipstick. Napkin rings. If the table is set with napkins in rings, after you have removed the napkin from the ring, put it in the upper left corner from the cutlery. After dinner, take the napkin by the center, thread it through the ring and place it on the table so that the center of the napkin looks at the center of the table. If you need to leave the table for a short time, put a napkin to the left of the plate. At the same time, try to fold the napkin so that the side you used is inside. What to do with a napkin after a meal? When the meal is over:
- Fold the napkin in any convenient way.
- If there is still a plate in front of you on the table, when leaving the table, put the napkin to the left of the plate.
- If the table in front of you is empty, put the napkin in the center of the table, where your plate was.
- Lay the napkin folded so that the soiled parts are not visible.
- If afternoon coffee is served at the dinner table, leave the napkin on your lap.
General rules
You need to sit at the table straight, at a comfortable distance from the table, so that your arms bent at the elbows are at the same level with knives and forks. Never put your elbows on the table! If you don’t know where to put your hands, just fold them on your knees. If you have already been served a dish, wait until all the guests at the table are served, and only after that pick up the utensils and start eating. An exception is if the host of the feast invited you to start the meal. Then you can start eating without waiting for the rest of the guests. How close should dishes be to you so that you can reach them yourself? Everything is simple here: it is permissible to reach only those objects that are in close proximity to you, so that you can reach them with your outstretched hand, slightly deviating to the side. Do not bend over your neighbor to get a dish. To get something that is out of your reach, just ask "Pass, please ...", and also do not forget to thank anyone who will give you the necessary item. According to the rules of etiquette, before the start of the meal, each of those present must make sure that the other guests have been offered everything they might need - oil, water, salt and pepper, etc. Let's focus on how properly pass food at the table.
- According to the rules, food is passed from left to right, while the dish should move in only one direction.
- Two options are possible: either one of the diners holds the dish while his neighbor fills his plate from it, or the diner passes the dish to the neighbor and he himself holds the dish and fills his plate.
- It is customary to put dishes that are heavy or inconvenient to hold on weight on the table with each transfer to a neighbor.
- It is customary to pass tureens and other utensils with handles in such a way that the handle looks towards the guest receiving the dish.
If the food is served on a platter and needs to be butchered, the following rule applies when passing such a platter around the table: each of the diners holds the platter while his neighbor on the right serves food from it using common utensils attached to the platter. A little explanation is needed here. All cutlery is divided into individual (basic) and general (auxiliary). Individual appliances are designed to receive dishes, and common ones are for laying them out. Use of common appliances:
- Common appliances are located to the right of the dish for which they are intended.
- If both a fork and a spoon are served with the dish, there is a rule: the spoon is placed to the right of the dish, so that it is convenient to scoop up and lift food, and the fork is placed to the left to support the food with it.
- Shared cutlery must be returned to the shared dish in the same way as they were served.
- If the serving spoon was served on a separate plate-stand, after use it must be placed in a common dish (thus preparing for use by the next guest).
- It is customary to point the blade of a carving knife into the dish to avoid cuts.
Eat at a calm pace, firstly, it contributes to better digestion, and secondly, this will show the owner of the feast that you want to enjoy both food and company. The quick absorption of food is a sign of disrespect for the owners, saying that you have come only to eat, and you are not interested in the company of those who have gathered. When eating, keep your mouth closed and try not to make any sounds, whether it be the clattering of cutlery against a plate or teeth, champing, or sipping soup. If the soup is too hot, don't blow on it - just wait until it cools down a bit. If you have food in your mouth - you should try to avoid talking at all costs, even if you have a suitable remark ready! First, chew, swallow food, and only then enter into a dialogue. If you need to go to the restroom, just say "Excuse me, I'll be away for a minute." If you need to leave the table due to an urgent matter (call, message, etc.), be sure to apologize to those present, show them that you would be more than happy to stay in their company, but business is urgent and you are forced to leave from the table. After all, you do not want your guests to get the impression that you are tired of their company!
Devices
How is it customary to put cutlery if you are still eating? Cross your knife and fork on your plate. If the size of the plate allows, it is better to fold the cutlery so that the tines of the fork rest on the blade of the knife. In this case, the knife handle should look to the right, and the fork handle to the left. This is a sign that you have not finished your dish yet, so your plate will not be changed. Please note that it is not customary to place cutlery in such a way that half is on the plate and half is on the table. However, this rule does not apply to chopsticks.
Exists two established how to use appliances- classic European(continental) and American. The first implies that the knife and fork are held in hands throughout the meal. It is not customary to put a knife on a plate, even if it is temporarily not needed. The American way of using cutlery allows for the possibility of putting the knife on the edge of the plate, if it is temporarily not needed, then the fork can be taken in the right hand and eat only with it. In this case, the knife must be placed with the blade inside the plate, with the handle on its edge. Dishes that do not need to be cut - scrambled eggs, scrambled eggs, pasta, vegetables, mashed potatoes, and so on - it is permissible to eat with a fork taken in the right hand. In this case, the fork can even be turned with the prongs up and the convex part down, like a spoon, to make it easier to pick up food. In this case, you can help yourself with a piece of bread, which is held in the other hand. Food is always cut towards itself and so that there are not too many pieces, and each of them can be easily put into the mouth. It is not customary to cut all the food into small pieces at once - do it gradually as needed. How to complete a meal. Each time you change dishes, when you have finished eating, the knife and fork (bulge down) are placed on the plate parallel to each other, the knife blade is facing inward. Instrument knobs are directed to the lower right corner. This is a signal to the waiter that you have finished eating.
A few words about how to complete the liquid meal that is eaten with a spoon. There are two options here - soup bowls and soup plates. If soup or dessert is served in a deep bowl or cup, which stand on a special plate-stand, the device / devices after eating should be placed on this stand. If it's too small to hold the utensils, leave them in the bowl. If the soup is served in a soup bowl (a fairly wide and relatively deep bowl), leave the spoon in the bowl after eating.
Always praise the chef!
Even if the food was terrible, find and say something positive. No need to lie, for example, if the meat is burnt, you can say: "Well, the sauce was really excellent." It's nice when lunch ends on a positive note.
table setting
Now let's take a closer look at the rules for using individual cutlery. What forks, knives and spoons to use at dinner? The number of cutlery at the table depends on the number of courses to be served. There is a simple rule - at each change of dishes, the devices are sequentially used, starting with the ones closest to the plate.
You will also need to remember that all devices that are located on the left (and these are always forks) should be held in your left hand. On the right are spoons and knives, which are held in the right hand. If you see that there are also cutlery for common dishes on the table, located with the handle to the left, then they should be taken with your left hand. A similar rule is used for devices located with the handle to the right. Now we will describe in more detail how to use these or other devices. As we mentioned above, the accepted norms of behavior at the table differ on different sides of the Atlantic. So: Europe against America. continental style Assumes that the fork should be held in the left hand, tines down. The knife is held in the right hand, at a level of 3-5 cm above the plate, while holding the blunt edge of the blade with the index finger. American style The fork is held in the same way as a pencil, its handle is between the thumb, index and middle fingers, and the remaining fingers are pressed to the palm. For the convenience of piercing food, the index finger is pulled out and pressed along the back surface of the fork handle as far as possible from the teeth. A knife is used if necessary. Hold the knife in your left hand on the folded middle, ring and little fingers, the index finger on the blunt edge of the blade, and the thumb on the opposite side of the handle. Using both a knife and fork is preferable, as it makes it easier to handle food. At formal dinners, two appliances are used for appetizers, salads, main courses, desserts and fruits. A knife should never be held like a pencil. When used in conjunction with a knife or spoon, the fork is held in the left hand in much the same way as a knife, with the tines pointing down. The spoon is held in the right hand, in the same way as the fork. Food should be eaten from the side of the spoon, it is never brought to the mouth at a right angle! Important! A spoon or fork should be lifted up and brought to your mouth, and not tilt your head to eat on them. Do not gesture with instruments.
Spices and bread
Let us dwell separately on the features of the use of spices and bread, as the most common and commonly used components of any feast. Rules for the use of salt and pepper Try! Before salting or peppering a dish, be sure to taste it. Pass salt and pepper together. Always pass both salt and pepper together, even if you are asked for the same thing. Open salt shakers. Some hosts prefer open salt shakers, and they are finding increasing use in table setting, often replacing the usual perforated salt shakers.
- If there is no spoon in the open salt shaker, use the tip of a clean knife to scoop out the salt.
- If an open salt shaker is only for you, you can take salt both on the tip of a knife, and just with a pinch - with your fingers.
- If an open salt shaker is shared by all guests, never take salt from it with your hands or with a dirty knife.
- It is customary to put salt taken from the salt shaker on a bread plate, or on the edge of any other plate in front of you.
How to properly handle bread and butter Usually bread on the table is served in a basket common to all guests at the table.
- If the bread basket is on the table in front of you, feel free to grab it and offer the bread to the neighbor on the right.
- If the loaf of bread is not sliced, cut off a few pieces, offer them to the neighbor on the left, and pass the rest of the bread, along with the basket, to the neighbor on the right.
- Do not touch bread with bare hands. Use the napkin that is placed under the loaf of bread in the basket to hold the loaf while you cut the bread.
- Bread and butter are traditionally placed on the butter plate, which is to your left. The correct way to do this is to cut or break off a piece of bread large enough so that you can eat it in one bite, spread some butter on it and eat.
- It is not customary to spread butter on a large piece of bread and then bite off it.
- It is not customary to hold a piece of bread in one hand and a drink in the other.
- Never take the last piece of bread without first offering it to other diners.
- Some restaurants serve bread with olive oil. In this case, you need to dip small (one bite) pieces of bread into the oil, and then eat them.
- Butter is usually produced in a rectangular shape, so a butter knife has a rounded blade to make it easy to smear butter, and serrations on the edge of the blade to prick butter on them to transfer it to a plate.
Table setting rules Whether you are organizing a formal dinner or a friendly meeting, the basic rules of table setting remain the same. Try to give each guest as much space as possible that the size of the table will allow. Leave small gaps between seats. As we already wrote, knives and spoons are always located on the right, forks - on the left. Formally, dessert plates should be placed at each seat - even if they are not supposed to be used - you can simply put folded napkins on them. The number of cutlery will depend on the planned menu, but the arrangement will remain the same - forks on the left, knives and spoons on the right. It is necessary to lay out the cutlery in the order of serving the dishes - the cutlery for the first courses is closest to the plate, and so on - the cutlery for each next dish is farther from the plate (sometimes the reverse order is found). Dessert spoons and forks at informal dinners can be placed on top of the plate, or served after the main course has been removed. Always serve desserts with both a spoon and a fork. For ice cream, serve with a standard teaspoon or a long-handled teaspoon. Sorbet, which can be served between meals, is usually eaten with a teaspoon. Up to four glasses are allowed on the table at the same time: for red (large) and white (smaller) wine, for sparkling wines (elongated narrow) and for water (low wide glass).
The rules for serving meals at dinner differ depending on the degree of formality of the event. For formal dinners, the following norms apply: food is brought separately to each person present at the table, while the waiter approaches the diner on the left with dishes or drinks. It is acceptable for plates to be filled with food in the kitchen and then taken out and placed in front of each of the guests at the table. At less formal meetings, the host arranges the dish on the plates of the guests, and then they are passed to all those present, or the guests themselves put food on their own plates and pass it to their neighbors if necessary. How to use chopsticks. If you're unsure of your chopstick skills, it's best to practice using them at home beforehand. You need to hold the sticks parallel to each other, in your right hand. The thumb and forefinger hold and control the top stick. The middle finger lies quietly between the sticks, and serves as a support for the lower stick, which remains motionless. The top stick is moved by the thumb and forefinger, and is used to grab food and bring it to the mouth. When you are not using chopsticks, place them to the right of the plate, often a special stand is provided for chopsticks. Never use chopsticks to pass food to anyone, and never use chopsticks to point at other people. And in conclusion, we recall that as the owner of the feast, it is not customary to start clearing the table until the guests have left.
Additional rules and subtleties of table etiquette
- It is possible to refuse a certain dish in case of an allergy to its constituent products, or due to dietary restrictions, and it is necessary to explain to the host of the feast (but not to all guests present) the reason for refusing the dish.
- If you have food stuck between your teeth, you should not attempt to get it at the table, even if you have toothpicks. In case you absolutely cannot tolerate this inconvenience, you must apologize, leave the table, and remove the stuck food from your teeth in the toilet room.
- Lipstick. Leaving lipstick marks on cutlery and glasses is bad form, especially not desirable at business dinners. If you have lipstick on your lips and don't have a tissue with you to remove it from your face, walk to the restroom, or grab a tissue from the bar when you approach the dining table.
- Smoking. Despite the fact that in our country smoking is prohibited in restaurants, you may find yourself in restaurants with smoking areas in other countries, so let's consider the table manners in this situation. So, even if your table is located in the smoking area, never smoke between meals. The smell of cigarettes significantly affects the taste sensations, and not in the best way. Wait until the end of dinner, and only after asking permission from those present, and making sure that no one objects, you can smoke. If anyone objects, retire to the bar. And never use plates as an ashtray.
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Each of us knows what "etiquette" is.
This term is divided into several branches, such as: smoking etiquette, table manners, communication etiquette, telephone etiquette and so on.
For the first time, the concept of "rules of etiquette at the table" appeared under King Louis XIV of France, but modern society still adheres to the norms and rules of etiquette. A lot of books have been written about the rules of behavior, the subject "Ethics" will be introduced into the school curriculum, schoolchildren from an early age are taught to behave, the rules of good taste, since this knowledge will undoubtedly be useful to them. About the basic rules of table etiquette below.
General rules
General rules of conduct must be known and remembered in order to give the impression of an educated and confident person. As the saying goes: "Meet by clothes." Depending on how you behave, the attitude towards you will become either positive or negative.
Straight posture.
Sit comfortably, relax your shoulders and arms, but your back should be level and confident;
During the meal, you need to talk only with those who are sitting next to you, you should not speak loudly, referring to a person sitting far from you;
Eating should take place without extraneous sounds.
There is no discussion about the need to understand the culture of food. Let's do without champing, coughing, talking with a full mouth and any sounds;
Elbows on the table are superfluous.
Your elbows on the edge of the table are bad form, however, it is allowed to lower the brushes, but only if you cannot do without it. If you want to try a dish, but hundreds of other delicacies separate you from it, you should not reach for it across the entire table. Quietly turn to a neighbor with a request to pass it to you;
Eat food calmly, measuredly and with taste.
Hunger overshadows your mind and dinner caught you after several hours of waiting, remember that it is not your style to pounce on food;
If the dish that is served to you is too hot, leave it alone, do not blow on it.
Wait for the temperature to drop by itself;
In no case do not fix your makeup or hair while sitting at the table.
If you feel that you need it, apologize to those present and leave for a couple of minutes.
Family dinner
In fact, the rules of conduct at the table at a family dinner and in a restaurant are different.
At a family dinner visiting friends, the rules of etiquette are a little softer, since people are close to you and they may forgive or not notice some of your mistakes.
Nevertheless, it is necessary to be on the alert and adhere to the rules that we will now recall:
- Be sure to praise the treat, the hostess will be flattered that her efforts were appreciated;
- Don't wait for the hosts to entertain you. Keep up the conversation, joke, tell funny stories from your life, but make sure that the dialogue does not turn into a monologue;
- Do not discuss politics, money and illness. Such topics at the table are inappropriate, moreover, a healthy tone of conversation can turn into a quarrel;
- If there are strangers in the company, wait until the owner introduces you to each other. It happens that a person did not make a good impression on you, then do not enter into a conflict. Be at ease and polite, because if he is among those invited, it means that the owners wanted to see him that day;
- If you feel like you need to use a toothpick, don't give preference to your tongue. Firstly, it looks disgusting, the expression of a person's face changes. Secondly, during the process, you can make obscene sounds. The best thing is to get by with a toothpick, very quickly and, if possible, imperceptibly;
- Do not take food from a common plate with your appliances. For this, there are common spoons, spatulas and tongs;
- You should not persistently offer your neighbor (and even worse - everyone present) a dish that you liked. Be sure that all guests know what dishes are on the table, they are able to take care of themselves;
- In order not to offend the hostess, try everything that she offered as lunch. If a dish does not meet your expectations, carefully leave it on the edge of the plate. Eat only what you like and in moderation;
- If you doubt your skills, just behave like others.
Restaurant
Another thing is lunch at a restaurant. As a rule, such a lunch can be business, with work colleagues or with management. Your career depends on the impression you make. On the other hand, lunch or dinner at a restaurant can be part of your date with your significant other.
- If a man invited a girl to a restaurant, he is obliged to offer her some dishes from the menu. It is considered bad form for a girl to show her disinterest, she should take part in the choice of dishes;
- If you came to the restaurant with a large company, you need to start eating when all the participants in the feast have taken out the dishes. If someone is waiting for their order, with his permission, the rest can start the meal;
- If you have become a member of a business dinner, being an active user of Instagram, it would be better if you refrain from having to take a picture of your dinner. Such actions would be excusable in the company of close friends;
- The ingredient of the dish that you cannot chew can be carefully returned to the fork, and then discreetly sent to the edge of the plate;
- Did you drop your fork? Do not worry - contact the waiter with a request to replace it with another one, do not lift it yourself;
- Get rid of the habit of loudly calling the waiter, and also do not snap your fingers, do not whistle, and do not bang the spoon on the glass. You can invite the waiter to the table with a nod or a slight wave of your hand, showing him that you treat him with respect. Finger snapping and whistling will not only worsen the impression of you, but also increase your chances of becoming the lucky owner of the secret ingredient in a drink or dish;
- You should not discuss in front of the waiter which of you will pay for dinner. It is necessary to agree on this in advance;
- If you are satisfied with the quality of food and drinks, thank the waiter verbally, then leave a generous tip.
Cutlery
Rules of conduct at the table, topics that should and should not be discussed - these are important knowledge that is necessary for a successful dinner or lunch in a decent company. However, every self-respecting person should know the rules for eating, namely, how to handle appliances.
- The left hand is a fork, the right hand is a knife. If you, for example, eat meat - do not cut the whole piece, gradually cut off small pieces with a knife, sending them into your mouth with a fork, otherwise the meat will cool quickly;
- Fish cannot be cut with a knife, a knife is necessary to separate the bone. If you still come across a bone, you can carefully use a napkin, but in no case with your hands;
- The first dish should be eaten, scooping a spoon away from you. At the end, when you are already finishing the dish, tilt the plate away from you;
- You can put salads from a common plate into your own with a special salad spoon, and use a fork. Salads cannot be cut with a knife;
- So, you want to try a sandwich. A piece of bread should be in your left hand, in your right hand there will be a knife with which you can spread the filling on the bread. They do not bite a sandwich, but use appliances;
- A piece of bread cannot be bitten off, it is necessary to break off small slices with your fingers;
- You feel that you need to interrupt your meal - put the utensils as if they were in your hands. To the right is a knife, and a fork to the left on the edge of the plate. At the end of dinner, the cutlery should lie crosswise, then the waiter will understand that your dinner is over.
How to drink alcohol
You already know what to talk about at the table, how to behave with a lady and hosts at a friendly dinner, how to use appliances. However, the drinking culture is very developed in Europe, so we will tell you how to drink alcoholic beverages correctly.
- Before the start of the meal, guests are served an aperitif - a light alcoholic drink that stimulates the appetite;
- In the women's company, the mistress of the house fills the glasses, otherwise it is the man;
- Wait until your neighbor finishes drinking, do not top up his glass and do not rush him;
- If the guest has left, his glass should remain empty;
- It is considered bad form to uncork bottles at the table. The exception is sparkling wine or champagne;
- Vodka, to the surprise of our compatriots, according to the rules of etiquette, is drunk with ice, in small sips and as a digestif. It is believed that a well-fed person does not get drunk;
- Eat first, drink later. You can not drink alcohol with food;
- Drink in the same rhythm as the rest of the guests. Don't rush anyone, but if you feel like you've had enough, stop;
- Enjoy alcoholic drinks. Inhale the aroma, appreciate the color saturation. Alcohol should bring pleasure, for this, treat alcohol carefully and responsibly.
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Some rules of behavior at the table are dictated by common sense and are quite understandable, for example, do not talk while eating, do not eat with a knife, while others contain their own, inexplicable at first glance, nuances. What are all these subtleties and what generally accepted rules of etiquette exist - read on.
How to sit at the table
The rules of conduct begin with how you need to sit at the table - you need to do this at a convenient distance from the dining table. The back should be straight. Keep your legs bent next to you, do not straighten them to their full length under the table. Where you sit is determined by the hosts in preparation for the reception.
Hands are held in a bent form, at the level of cutlery. Only hands can be kept on the table. Don't put your elbows on the table! You can’t figure out where to put your hands - fold them on your knees.
During a conversation, it is customary to turn your head to the interlocutor, and not the whole body. Speak in a restrained tone and do not gesticulate actively.
What to do with a napkin
The etiquette of behavior at the table always assumes that the dishes for the guest are served with a napkin. In addition to its main function of keeping the hands and mouth clean, it serves as a sign of the beginning of the meal, when the host of the evening puts it on his lap. 
A large napkin is left on your knees folded in half, a smaller napkin is unfolded completely. If the napkin is served in a ring, then you remove it and leave it in the upper corner to the left of your plate.
Wipe your fingers and lips with it as needed. When you need to leave, the napkin stays on your seat. Leave the used napkin at the plate, trying to wrap the soiled places inside, or, if possible, put it into the ring in the same form.
At the end of the meal, the napkin should lie on the left side of your plate - no need to fold it, wrinkle it too, just gently place it on the side. The plate has already been taken away - leave the napkin exactly in its place.
How to use cutlery
Studying the rules of behavior at the table, many, first of all, are afraid of a large number of cutlery. In fact, they are not so difficult to remember, especially since they are rarely used all at once. There is one tip that will make it easier for you if you set the table correctly: you should always start with the appliances located farthest from the plate and work towards the main appliances that lie next to the plate. 
Hold the fork with your left hand. The tines of the fork should point down. When pricking food, you can lean with your index finger on the junction between the handle and the teeth, but away from the latter. When using only the fork, it can be held in the right hand. 
Take the knife with your right hand, clasping it with your middle, ring and little fingers, the thumb supports the knife from below, and the index finger rests on the handle, but not on the back of the blade. Never hold a knife like a pencil. Eating with a knife is unacceptable, but above all, dangerous. 
Hold the spoon between your index and thumb, by the middle of the handle. 
If the device fell on the floor, do not continue to use it, but apologize to the owner and ask for a new one.
Serve food from common dishes not with individual appliances, but with serving ones.
You need to hold any glass exclusively by the leg, so as not to heat the drink with your fingers. The cup is held by the handle. When taking a sip, it is customary to look into the cup, and not over it and at others.
How to use chopsticks
The use of chopsticks implies separate rules. If you don't know how to hold the chopsticks correctly, then practice in advance, for example, with the help of this video.
When you're not using your chopsticks, place them on a special stand or to the right of your plate. 
In no case should you cross the chopsticks on a plate, leave them in food and pierce it.
Rules of conduct while eating
- Do not scatter food and leftovers on your plate. If you come across a bone or other inedible element, do not spit it out, but gently place it with your lips on a napkin and fold it near the plate.
- Do not try to talk with a full mouth - food must first be completely chewed and swallowed. It is considered good form not to make any sounds while eating - do not slurp, do not smack your lips, do not suck drinks noisily. Loudly knocking cutlery on the dishes is also not very decent.
- Do not cut all the meat or fish into pieces at once. Cut off only one piece at a time before you eat it and cut off the next one.
- Scoop soup with a spoon only in the direction away from you. Tilt the plate to make it more convenient to scoop up the remnants of the soup, you can also only in this direction. When you fill your spoon with food, do it in such a way that you can carry it to your mouth without ruining the tablecloth. Do not blow on a spoon with hot food.
- When eating, do not tilt your head to the plate, but bring food to your mouth with the help of utensils.
- You can’t reach across the table to take food - ask the person sitting closer to pass the necessary and be sure to thank him. Take only what you can safely reach, sitting straight, or slightly leaning to the side.
Take your time
When you're the host, keep an eye on the overall pace of your meal, pause after each spoonful or sip so you don't get too ahead of your guests and make them feel like they're being rushed. 
As a guest, in the same way, do not rush to quickly absorb food, show the host that you enjoy not only food, but the company is also interesting to you.
How to leave the table
If you need to go to the toilet, apologize to those present and say that you need to go out.
When you need to leave the company for good (for example, you don’t feel well, or you got a call and urgently called somewhere), apologize to those present and say that you would still be happy to stay if it weren’t for force majeure.
Restaurant etiquette
The rules of conduct at the table are common to everyone, although restaurant etiquette has its own nuances associated with the specifics of service.
- It is not necessary to call the waiter by shouting. Ideally, try to make eye contact. Otherwise, raise your hand with your index finger up to get attention. In some restaurants, special call buttons are starting to appear right on the table - then use it.
- When sending back poorly prepared or spoiled food, it is polite to tell your company that they can start eating without waiting for you.
- In the event that you ordered wine, but you did not like it, you do not have the right to return it, because a bottle has already been opened for you. But if the wine is really that awful, you can try to talk delicately to your waiter and explain the situation.
- If you want to try someone's dish, then don't reach for someone else's plate across the table - have some food to sample served to you in a bread plate. In the case of a formal, business dinner or with unfamiliar people, it is better to leave this idea.
- Many people forget about this, or even simply do not know, but putting a mobile phone on the dining table is just as wrong as a handbag or keys. In addition to the fact that this item has nothing to do with the meal, it distracts you from both food and your company. As well as according to the rules of theatrical etiquette, it is advisable to put the phone on silent mode in a restaurant, because you are also in a cultural institution.
- Girls who want to freshen up their make-up can quickly and gently update their lipstick after dinner is over, but that's about it. For the rest, it’s better to use the ladies’ room, putting on all the makeup at the table is bad form.
You can watch the following video about table manners when going to a restaurant.
Can I take pictures of food?
With the development of social networks and the strengthening of their influence on everyday life, it has become very popular to photograph a dish before eating, and sometimes not only young people, but also people of other ages do this. The question began to arise whether such actions are allowed by the culture of behavior at the table. 
It's hard to resist this trend, so if you want to take a photo of your food, you can do it, but make sure you don't disturb anyone and your companions don't mind, and don't leave your camera on the table after taking a photo. Do not use the flash and turn off the shutter sound effect. The same rules of conduct apply to your selfies - try not to cause discomfort to others and do not turn this venture into a photo shoot.
There is a so-called Silent Service Code - certain rules for folding cutlery during and at the end of a meal in order to demonstrate to the waiter your opinion about the service, readiness to move on to the next dish, etc. 
- Pause in eating: cross the knife and fork towards each other, the knife points to the handle to the right, the fork to the left. You use only one device - put it on the edge of the plate, resting the handle looking to the right on the table.
- I am waiting for the next dish: cross the knife and fork on the plate at a right angle, perpendicular to each other; the fork faces north, the knife faces west.
- The meal is over, the plate can be taken away: there are several ways to show this, the main thing is to put the cutlery between ten and four o'clock, if you think of the plate as a dial. But most often the knife and fork are folded parallel to each other in the five o'clock direction, in the European (continental) style - with the teeth down, in the American - up.
- The meal is over, you liked the dish: if you want to show appreciation for the delicious food, then at the end of the meal, put the cutlery parallel to each other and across the plate, in a horizontal position.
- The meal is over, the dish did not like: suppose you did not like the food and you want to demonstrate it - cross the cutlery in such a way that the knife clings to the tines of the fork.
Etiquette for children
The rules of behavior at the table for children are not particularly different from the rules for adults, the task is to be able to intelligibly tell the child about this. He is unlikely to be interested in dry text from a book, therefore it is better to approach the explanation in a playful way, using children's puzzles, songs, riddles and other techniques - for example, colorful pictures with poems on table etiquette that can be easily learned will be very By the way.
And most of all, kids will like instructive and funny videos, where the rules of behavior at the table are presented in a playful or entertaining form, for example, like this:
We hope that our material was able to shed light on the culture of behavior at the table, and the corresponding rules of etiquette will no longer be a mystery to you.
- Don't put your fingers in your mouth or take food out of your teeth. Excuse yourself and go to the bathroom.
- Don't overload your plate at the buffet.
- If something indecent happens (belching, hiccups), or if excess food falls out of your mouth, then calmly apologize. Do not make an elephant out of a fly and no one else will focus on this.
- Don't talk with your mouth full.
- Don't tilt your face down into the plate. Instead, sit up straight and bring the utensils to your mouth.
- If you have chewing gum, get rid of it before eating. Sticking it under the table is considered bad manners.
- Don't take something last until you ask if someone would like to take it.
- Leave food on the plate that you don't want.
- Chew with your mouth closed.
- If you need to leave the table, say, "Excuse me." Don't say where you're going.
- When eating or cutting something, keep your elbows close to your body.
- Don't make noise, sing, or whistle at the table unless everyone else is doing it.
- Don't tilt your chair back.
- Don't salt your food if you don't have to.
- The eating habits of others are never criticized in public.
- If you have already used the dishes, do not touch them again! Leave food on the plate.
- Bring food to your mouth, not your mouth to your plate.
- Sit up straight.
- Don't push your plate away when you've finished eating.
- Do everything for the owner. For example, don't sit down, start eating, or leave the table until he does it first, or invites you to do so.
- Grab a glass when you drink through a straw.
- Do not dip the spoon twice in a common dish.
- When people leave the table, don't ask them where they are going.
- Do not embarrass yourself or the owner.
- Don't interrupt someone; it makes a bad impression.
- Do not talk with food or drink in your mouth.
- When resting, you can put your elbows on the table, placing them between dishes. But only after eating, not during it.
- Do not talk about unpleasant things at the table.
- The glasses are different. One, which is rounder, is used for red wine, and the other, which is taller, is used for white wine. Hold a white wine glass by the stem to keep it warm, and hold a red wine glass by the bowl, as red wine tastes best when warmed by the warmth of your hands.
- When it comes to a plate of bread, cups, etc., dining at a large table with other people, many people wonder which of these is theirs. Always take the one on the left.
- If you make a loud noise and drop your spoon (or something like that), don't draw attention to it. Most likely, no one noticed, or even paid attention.
Today it is very important to know the rules of conduct at the table. This is one of the necessary branches of knowledge that helps us behave correctly in any situation, because eating is our daily procedure.
The extent to which a person knows the rules of conduct at the table (etiquette) shows the level of his upbringing and can say a lot about him. With this knowledge, we make ourselves agreeable and show good manners. This can be as a dinner in a close family circle, where often the rules of etiquette are not particularly observed, or a meal with colleagues or on a date.
A modern person must follow a few standard rules. We are talking about the usual technical points, observing which we show ourselves in the best light. Here are some of those rules.
Conversation
An important part of etiquette is conversation. There are also rules of conduct at the table during a conversation, and we are usually familiar with them from childhood.
- When someone addresses you at the table with a toast, it will be correct to lift the glass from the table and keep it hanging until the toast finishes. This is usually followed by "choking" glasses, and all the diners drink from the glasses. By the way, while doing this, you need to look at the person to whose glass you bring yours, directly in the eyes. In some countries, such as Germany, looking away is considered rude.
- Don't stuff your mouth when you want to address someone or when someone is talking to you. In no case do not chew when chewing.
Manners
It is important to know how to sit at the table, how to behave during a social event or an informal meeting. In principle, it can be noted that the rules of conduct at the table (etiquette) in both cases do not differ. It's just that some of them at informal meetings are not so strict to implement.
- Do not slouch at the table, and do not put your elbows on it. It will be correct to lean only with your wrists on the table or even put your hands on your knees, while pressing your elbows to yourself. Nevertheless, it is permissible for a woman to lean on the table with one elbow for a short time. The legs should be straight, stretching them is also considered ugly.
- At events where there are many guests, dishes must be passed through those sitting next to them. And this is done counterclockwise. That is, getting up across the table for the desired salad, for example, is not worth it. Just ask other guests to pass it to you.
- The host of the evening or dinner begins to eat first.
Napkin
There are separate rules of conduct at the table regarding napkins.
These are simple actions that will demonstrate your knowledge of etiquette.
- The napkin should be on your lap. The host of the event takes his napkin first. At the same time, do not make unnecessary sudden movements - shaking and swinging, calmly and silently unfold your napkin.
- Do not tuck the napkin into the collar, belt, do not try to fit it somewhere above the knees.
- It is customary to wipe your lips with a napkin before drinking from a glass, as there may be traces of lipstick or greasy food on it.
- If you must leave the table, leave your napkin in your chair.
- When the meal is over, it is customary to put a napkin to the left of the plate. A napkin that has fallen on the floor should be replaced with a new one by asking the waiter about it.
Cutlery and other items on the table
Of course, an important part of etiquette is the rules of conduct at the table regarding cutlery.
- We hold the fork in the right hand, and the knife in the left. Golden Rule. For a left-hander, the opposite is true. When interrupting for a conversation, place your cutlery on the plate so that they are completely placed on it.
- If you are just interrupting your meal, lay your cutlery on a plate crosswise, if you are done with this dish, lay the cutlery in a horizontal position, parallel to each other so that the handles look diagonally at 10 o'clock (compared to the clock face).
- If there are a lot of different cutlery on the table, and you don’t understand, for example, it’s a dessert spoon or a soup spoon, then there is one hint: the cutlery always lies in the order in which the dishes will be served. That is, the first device from the plate is used first, and so on - to the last.
Rules of conduct at the table: how to eat?
- Do not finish the dish completely, leaving no trace of it. Leave decorations on the plate.
- All meals served in restaurants are eaten with cutlery. Special, exotic dishes that you may have eaten with your hands at home should also be eaten with utensils that will be served especially for them.
- Before asking for a salt or pepper shaker, you must try the dish. Even if you know for sure that it will be undersalted. The demonstration of such "predictions" also indicates a lack of taste and an attempt to upset the hostess, doubting her skill.
- Bread must be broken off by hand, without biting. Dipping slices of bread in a sauce or a hot dish is also not worth it.
- The rules of behavior at the table say the following: if bread and butter are served with the dish, it is necessary to break the bread into small pieces so that you can eat it in one or two bites, and only then spread butter on each piece.
- Bones, cartilage or other inedible elements of the dish are taken out of the mouth with a fork: bring it to your mouth and help yourself with your lips and tongue, then put it on the edge of your plate. Of course, it would be better to do this as discreetly as possible. It can be a bone from an olive or fish.
- The sauce for the dish is usually served with a special spoon. It is necessary to take such a spoon and put the sauce on the edge of the plate. Do not try to dip food directly into a common gravy bowl or pour gravy all over your dish. Sometimes a gravy boat can be served with a spout and without a spoon. In this case, look at the consistency of the sauce, if it is liquid and served with meat, then pour over the meat. If normal density, put on the edge of the plate.
It is also important to explain the rules of behavior at the table to children from a young age, at least the basics: do not slurp, eat carefully and slowly, sit evenly.
Beverages
- Do not blow on a hot drink. It is best to wait until it cools down to the temperature you need.
- Be sure to hold the cup by the handle. Don't grab it with both hands.
- If it so happened that the drink spilled on the saucer, you do not need to wipe it with a napkin. In this case, you just need to ask the waiter to replace the saucer. Of course, do not dip cookies, cakes or other sweets into your cup of hot drink.
If you want to attract attention to yourself, and you are not at all worried about your reputation, then comic rules of behavior at the table will help you. In this case, you can do everything exactly the opposite. Just make sure that it is absolutely safe for you and will not affect your future life in any way. This can be done in an informal setting, for example, you went to visit friends and, in order to show how satisfied you are with this visit, nobly “smack” at the table, arguing how delicious it was for you to eat treats.
Eventually
In our article, we told you the rules of conduct at the table briefly, but there are more extended versions. But it is important to understand that strict adherence to all these rules is not always appropriate. And if you use all of them in an informal setting, it can become too pompous. Good things should always be in moderation.
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